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He blinked, frozen for a long moment. Then he shook his head dismissively. “You made that one up,” Tim accused.
Raven chuckled at his derisive tone. “Nope.” She watched as the waitress walked by with a giant piece of chocolate cake dripping with chocolate syrup and chocolate whipped cream. “Oh my!” she whispered, reverence in her tone.
Tim snapped his fingers, bringing her attention back to him. “What’s weaponized incompetence?”
Raven licked her lips, then stared down at her half-eaten burger. Another snapping sound and she looked up, glaring at him. “Do that again and I’ll break your fingers.”
He chuckled and stole another fry. “You might have scared me more if you’d threatened my fries.”
The waitress walked by and he lifted his hand. “Is everything okay?”
Tim nodded and nearly laughed out loud when Raven, the adorable vixen, angled her head to gaze at the enormous slab of chocolate cake that a family of four was now devouring. She was going to ignore her desire, he thought. And that would be a shame. “We’re going to need a piece of whatever that is,” he said, jabbing his thumb behind him.
The waitress turned her head, then smiled. “That’s the chocolate decadence dessert.” She stuffed her hands into her apron and nodded. “I’ll get that right out for you.”
Raven lifted her hand, prepared to stop the waitress, but the woman was already gone, heading towards the kitchen. It was a half-hearted effort anyway. She wanted that chocolate cake! She didn’t delve into the reason for her food obsession today. If she were to consider the reasons, it might have something to do with the man sitting across from her and his drool-worthy shoulders.
However, today was not a day to understand one’s motives. Today was a day to be decadent.
“Oh my!” she whispered when the waitress brought the towering chocolate cake to their table with two spoons.
She glanced at the second spoon, her eyes wide. “I thought you were trying to be healthy?”
He rolled his eyes and took the spoon, diving into the mousse-like cake. “Eating dinner with you is not conducive to restraint.”
She grinned and took the cherry on top. “Not today!” she exclaimed, then closed her eyes as she savored the sweet cherry.
“So, what’s weaponized incompetence?” he demanded, pushing her spoon out of the way when she tried to hog the chocolate whipped cream.
“It’s when a man asks his spouse how to do something, such as the laundry, and pretends that he can’t figure it out. He asks so many questions that she just gives up and does it herself. Or he does the task so badly that she just does it herself because it’s too frustrating to ask him to help. It’s manipulative and hurtful to the relationship.”
“You don’t think women do that as well?”
She nodded. “Of course women do it. I hated mowing the grass as a kid. So, if I ever get married…”
“If?” he interrupted. “You don’t plan on getting married?”
She shrugged and took another bite of the chocolate cake. “I guess I will. But right now, my career is more important than finding someone to share my life with. I believe that a person needs to be a whole person before they can invite someone else into their lives.”
He grunted in response, then took another bite of the chocolate cake, adding chocolate syrup. “Fine. Finish your explanation about mowing the grass. What does that have to do with weaponized incompetence.”
She grinned and shrugged one shoulder. “As a kid, I had to mow the grass during the summer months. I hate the heat and the mosquitoes and all the bugs.” She stole his scoop of chocolate syrup because he was hogging it. He merely stole it back and held her hand down, causing her to laugh.
“Keep explaining, woman,” he ordered, releasing her hand and taking another bite.
“Well, my father wanted me and my brother to mow the grass with clean, straight lines. But since I hated mowing, I’d zigzag across my portion of the yard, making the lines look blurred and messy.”
He stopped eating the chocolate cake, staring at her in horror. “That should be considered one of the original sins, Raven,” he told her with a manly, serious expression.
She laughed, mostly because he was absolutely serious. “I take it that you prefer neat, clean lines in your lawn as well?’
“Absolutely! It’s in the man code. And if any of the male neighbors spotted a messy lawn…,” he stopped, unable to speak of such insanity. “Just…!” Again, he shook his head. “You are a menace!”
A shrug was her only response. “You’re making my point. I did such a horrible job that my father stopped making me mow the grass. He gave me other chores to do, which were fine with me. But that’s weaponized incompetence. I was perfectly capable of mowing the grass. Just as men are perfectly capable of doing laundry, vacuuming the carpets, fixing dinners, and all the other stuff that mothers typically take charge of. But men let the women do it, and the women can’t release the task, because their husbands, some husbands, purposely try to mess it up, either consciously or unconsciously. It becomes easier just to do it themselves.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever done that to a woman,” Tim asserted, then pushed the last bite of the chocolate cake towards her.
Raven scooped up the bite with a happy sigh. But before she put it into her mouth, she pointed the spoon towards him. “That’s probably because you’ve never been in a serious relationship.”
