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Faye pales. “I—I’m sorry, Lori. I didn’t mean to. I was actually coming over to apologize for last night. I had no right to say any of that stuff to you. I was projecting my own insecurities on you, and you didn’t deserve it.”
It’s obvious she means every word, and it softens my anger.
I can see she wants to add more but hesitates because we have an audience. Other than our friends and the random families that are here, there’s also a group of guys around our age, maybe older, who are walking on the shore. They’re loud and have beers in their hands, clearly already started with the day-drinking.
Suddenly I’m claustrophobic, even though I’m on an open beach and the breeze whips at my hair. I came here to get away, to have time to think, and now Adam is confronting me while all our friends, as well as strangers, are here to witness it.
“It’s okay, Faye, we’ll talk after,” I tell her, bending down to scoop up my bag and flip-flops.
She nods and breathes out a sigh of relief. Right now I don’t want to talk to anyone. I just want tobe, to figure out how this new resolve will fit into my life.
Adam glances at the stuff in my hands. “Where are you going?” He steps closer to me as I take a step back, my toes sinking into the sand. “Let’s talk about this, Lori. Stop running away.”
I bite back my response that if he knows me as well as he claims, then he’d know that running away is basically my go-to.
But this time, I don’t feel like I’m running away. I’m done being talked down to, and I said what I had to say. I stood up for myself, and there’s nothing else I can say that’ll change Adam’s mind. The longer I stand here, the angrier I get, and I’m done being angry.
“I’m not running away, Adam. I’m just done with this conversation. I’ll talk to you once you get your head out of your ass.”
Deciding to stay barefoot, I slip my flip-flops into my beach bag and march away.
“Lori!” Adam calls out, but I keep on my path, my spine straight, my head held high. I’m proud of myself for not caving.
The only issue is that I need to walk right past Dean and our other friends, and that makes my confidence waver. They’re standing on the stone path, so I decide to continue walking on the sand along the shoreline, so I don’t need to come within a few inches of them. But now I have to walk right past the other guys, the loud ones who are drinking, who are now throwing a football back and forth. All three eye me as I approach, and even though I’m only wearing a triangle bikini top and jean shorts, I don’t back down when they blatantly check me out.
“Hey beautiful, wanna join us?” asks the one closest to me, who’s wearing his baseball hat backwards.
I continue walking without acknowledging him when an arm wraps around my waist and a hand lands on my butt. “Hey, come on, don’t be like that,” he prods, the heat from his hand burning through my jean shorts.
I suddenly remember Pervy Gym Guy, who Dean had to confront for me, the guy from the club who Naomi had to rescue me from, and the tons of other guys who’ve put their hands on me, and how I was too timid to do anything.
Without a second thought, I slam my knee up between his legs and shove him away from me. “Don’tfuckingtouch me!” I yell as he keels over in the sand with a groan.
His friends take a few tentative steps toward the guy in the backwards baseball hat, but the rage must show on my face because when I meet their eyes they hesitate and glance down at the sand.
With my blood still pumping, I risk a glance at my friends, and every single one of them is now closer to me and frozen where they are, staring at me with wide eyes. The only person who doesn’t seem shocked into stillness is Dean, who’s now the closest to me, and his lips pull up at the corners as he regards me.
My own lips curl up in answer, and he nods at me once. I shouldn’t care as much as I do, and I don’t need his approval, but the thought of Dean seeing me standing up for myself, that I proved Ican, not only to him but to myself, makes me giddy with pride. Adam’s frowning at me, and my smile widens thinking that I just did somethingsweet, predictableLori wouldn’t dream of.
Instead of facing them all, I adjust my beach bag on my shoulder and stride toward the hotel, ignoring Adam calling out to me. I need to cool off, and so does he. Until he realizes he can’t keep telling me what to do, how to act, and what to think, I have nothing to say to him. And maybe I should go talk to Dean, to sort out everything that happened, but I don’t want to overwhelm myself. It was only last week that any kind of confrontation made me ill, and even though I’m trying to become someone who stands up for herself, I don’t want to overdo it.
Barefoot, I step onto the stone path just as the first raindrop hits my shoulder.
TWENTY-ONE
Day Five of Cuba
Faye
We all watch Lori fade into the distance with facial expressions ranging from pure shock to awestruck to admiration. When that guy grabbed her, we all made a beeline toward her, Dean faster than any of us, but she stopped us all in our tracks by kneeing him right in the balls. It was a total badass move, and it serves him right for groping her. I just hope she’s okay after that, and especially after what happened with Adam. Hell, sheswore—dropped a full-on eff bomb—and I’ve never even heard Lori sayshitbefore. If that didn’t tell us how pissed she is, I don’t know what will.
Until now, I thought she wanted to be with Adam, but after seeing her stand up to him, I feel even stupider than before. She can handle herself, clearly, and doesn’t need me to fight all her battles. I realize that now; I realized that before with Dylan too. I just hope Lori knows that, and knows how much I love her, and that I never meant to hurt her, on this trip or before.
Adam rounds on me. “This is all your fault.”
“What? Me?”
“Yes, you,” he repeats, the disappointed face he reserves just for me on full display. “It’s your fault Lori’s feeling like she’s being pushed around. You do it to her too often without realizing.”
