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His statement takes me aback and fills me with rage. “Were you not listening during that conversation? She was talking aboutyou! And yes, while I see what she said applies to me too, her entire spiel was directed at you!”
Water lands on my forehead, and I glance up at the sky. It’s darker than it was before, and while it’s not full-on raining, it’s working up to it. The football guys have left with their gropey friend, and the other beachgoers are packing up their things now that raindrops are falling, albeit slowly and spaced apart. But Adam and I stay where we are, our friends close by as well.
“This wouldn’t have happened if you weren’t so damn selfish all the time, Faye,” Adam accuses, crossing his arms over his chest.
I peer at the guys standing only a few feet away and catch Kellan’s gaze. Everything he’s told me runs through my mind, and his brown eyes reinforce my confidence. I know what I need to do, and I’m too fed up to be as scared as I should be.
“You’re right,” I admit, taking him by surprise. “I have been selfish, but not in the way you’re thinking. I was trying to protect myself from you, your disappointment, your resentment, your disdain, and in doing so I was being selfish and hurting Kellan.”
Kellan rushes to us. “Faye, you don’t have to do this. It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not okay,” I tell him with resolve.
Kellan’s eyes bore into mine as he studies me. “Don’t do this for me. Only if it’s what you want, if you’re ready.”
My heart pounds in my chest as I take in his face, the concern written all over it. Concern forme, not for Adam freaking out. Even though he feels like I’m hiding him, like I don’t want people to find out about us, he’s still not forcing me to reveal our relationship to Adam. I’m not sure if we evenhavea relationship, but I still owe it to myself, to Kellan—hell, even toAdam—to come clean about my feelings. All this time I thought Kellan didn’t want to be withme, that he was ashamed of me.
Meanwhile, he’s been feeling the same way because of me. Well, not anymore. I’m fixing this now.
“What’s going on here?” Adam asks, eyes bouncing back and forth between me and Kellan.
“Kellan and I . . . we’re . . .” What exactly am I supposed to tell him? We’re fucking? Wewerefucking? We were exclusive for about an hour?
Kellan’s silent beside me, and Adam huffs out an impatient sigh. “You and Kellan are what, Fayanna?”
I don’t know if I’m feeding off the high of Lori’s badassness or the heat of Kellan beside me or the annoyance on Adam’s face, but I blurt out, “I’m in love with him!”
The second the words are out of my mouth, I freeze, and so do the two guys standing with me. I’ve never said it out loud, and never to Kellan. Now not only does he know the truth, but so does my brother.
Adam’s deathly still as he processes this, glancing at his best friend for only a second before yelling, “You’rewhat?” at the same time Kellan asks, “You’re in love with me?”
Turning to face Kellan, I ignore my brother’s shock and the sporadic fat raindrops that are cold against my burning skin.
“Yes. And have been for a long while, I just never realized it until this trip, where I was so stupidly jealous of you and Kiara. I’m sorry for how I’ve been acting, and I never meant to hide you or hurt you.”
Now that the truth’s out there, my chest is lighter. The only issue is that Kellan’s expression is neutral, so I’m completely in the dark about what he’s thinking.
He didn’t say he loves me back.
“Wait,” Adam says, knocking Kellan aside so he can come between us. “Have you and Kellan . . . have you beenfucking?
How long has this been going on?”
Andthereis the anger and disappointment I was trying to avoid. But my mere existence garners those emotions from Adam, so telling the truth about me and Kellan shouldn’t faze me. But it does, and I shrink under the ferocity of his gaze.
Before I can answer, Adam rounds on Kellan. “Mysister?
Seriously, Kellan, what the fuck is wrong with you? And doing it all behind my back? Have I ever been home while it was happening?” He pauses his rant and his face pales, then he lowers his voice and speaks slowly. “Have I ever—and I meanever—heard the details of you and Faye without knowing you were talking about mysister?” He looks nauseated, and the fluctuation of his emotions isn’t helping me gauge how he’s processing the news.
“What? No!” Kellan exclaims. “I’ve never talked about me and Faye to you. And I’m sorry for keeping it from you, but it was for the best.”
Even now, facing Adam’s wrath, Kellan’s not throwing me under the bus. Hewantedto tell Adam, wanted to telleveryonefrom the second it happened.I’mthe one who wanted it to be a secret, and he’s not revealing that to Adam. He didn’t say he loved me back, but he’s protecting me, even now, even though I don’t deserve it, and I feel like crying and throwing myself at him and never letting go.
But I won’t let Adam take out his anger on Kellan. “No, it’s not his fault, stop looking at him like that.”
Kellan looks at me in surprise, but I’m so overwhelmed I can’t read the other emotions on his face.
“Hey!” someone yells, causing Adam, Kellan, and me to search for the source. Dylan, Dean, and Alessio join us just as a very large,verymuscular guy comes into view. To say he’s angry is an understatement, and he marches toward us with a purpose.
