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“Fine. Then take that weirdo wannabe rapper over to your house and play board games with him.”
“I mean, when you put it like that, it does sound stupid, but... Oh gosh,” I whisper. “He’s coming back.” I hang up, put the phone into my handbag and smile up at Zevo.
“Yo. Yo. Yo. Did you miss me? I bet you did because I am tasty.”
I stare at him for a couple of seconds. “Well, I was just thinking maybe we could play a board game later.” Even as the words come out of my mouth, I regret them.
“Oh my gosh, that would be amazing,” he says. “I love board games. What game? Monopoly?”
“Yeah, we can play Monopoly. I think I have it.”
“Yo, if you don’t have it, we can go back to my place. My roommate might be home, and he might want to join us, but...”
“No, it’s fine. I’m pretty sure I have it.” I say quickly. There was no way I was going back to his place.
“So you want to get some dessert here, or do you want to get it to go?” he says. “Hey, that could be a rhyme.” He thinks for a second. “Yo, yo, yo. You want to get dessert here, or you want to get it to go? Do you want me to eat all up in your face? You like chocolate, or is that a disgrace?”
I stare at him for a couple of seconds, and then I start clapping because I don’t know what else to do. It’s not like I can tell him to shut up and that his rapping sucks, though I know that I’m never going to see him again after tonight.
“Why don’t you get something to go?” I say quickly. “And we can have it at my place when we play Monopoly.” I’m already regretting the suggestion, but there’s nothing else I can do.
“Sounds good. I’ll get some chocolate cake, and then we can feed each other.” He licks his lips. “Hey, you’ll have white chocolate and dark chocolate. How’d you like that?”
“Oh, I don’t know how I’ve gone my life without having white chocolate and dark chocolate,” I say sarcastically, and he laughs.
“I mean, if you had a devil’s threesome, maybe.”
“Excuse me?” I say, blinking at him.
“You know, one woman, two guys. If you had a black guy and a white guy, then you’d have milk chocolate or dark chocolate and white chocolate together. Yo, if you had a foursome, you could have white chocolate, milk chocolate, and dark chocolate. Did I just come up with something? Shit,” he says. “Man, I could be famous. What would I call it? The chocolate night of adventures?” He pauses and tilts his head to the side. “Does that sound cool?”
“No,” I say, not even caring. “It doesn’t sound cool. It sounds absolutely...” I bite down on my lower lip as I hear my phone beeping. I look at the screen. It’s Colton again.
Colton: So you coming over or what?
Me: Nope, sorry. We’re going back to my place.
I don’t know why I told him that. I guess I just felt like I needed him to know that the date was going fantastically, even though the date was going horrendously. I didn’t like how he felt like I was just going to fall into his arms whenever he wanted me, and I didn’t like that I wanted to fall into his arms. I didn’t like that I was falling for him because I knew there was never going to be anything between Colton and I, ever. Not really, aside from these silly little games we were playing.
“I’m going to just go and wash my hands,” I say. “You can order the cake, and hopefully, we can just go when this is done.”
“Sounds good, chica. I wouldn’t want to be ya, but I’d like to see ya. If you want to eat ya, I can grant you a little tasty wasty of my...”
I stand up and leave the table. There’s just no way I can listen to any more of this. As I make my way to the bathroom, I pull my phone out. “Isabel, I’m an idiot.”
“Oh boy. What did you do?” she says.
“I invited him over to my place to play Monopoly.”
“Okay. And?”
“And all he’s been doing is rapping ever since, and I think he might think that something’s going to go down, but it’s totally not going to go down.”
“Girl, of course he thinks something’s going to go down. You invited him to your house after a first date. He totally thinks he’s going to get some.”
“Well, he’s not getting any.”
“I know he’s not getting any because the only one you want to give something to is Colton.”
