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Not anytime soon, anyway.
Fallon exhales dramatically, "Don't you just love how they never run out of things to say to each other?"
I look over at her, see the far-off, dreamy look in her eyes as she stares at the TV screen, wonder why she always settles for assholes. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're a hopeless romantic."
"Definitely hopeless," she winks at me.
"Fal, why haven't you ever had a serious relationship?" I ask, genuinely curious.
My blond best friend is smart, creative, even designed the school yearbook cover by herself. She got into some East Coast private school to major in Graphic Design. She's gorgeous, witty, somewhat foul-mouthed, but fun, honest, loyal. She's a catch and I can't quite figure out why she doesn't see it.
"Why get tied down?" she shrugs nonchalantly. "I'm not interested in getting married or giving up things for a relationship right now. You know my longest relationship is our friendship, Jenny. Fuck, I just want to have fun. Meet new people. Have experiences. Live a little before I get trapped in a loveless, soul-sucking marriage like my parents."
When she puts it that way, it sounds so...depressing.
"I kind of like the idea of sharing experiences with just one person," I reveal.
Fallon reaches over, grabs my hand, squeezes it. "I know you do. And that's OK, too."
The doorbell rings and we both look toward the front door.
"Who the fuck could that be?" Fallon scrunches her nose. "It's almost 11."
Mom and Dad are already in bed, so I wrap a blanket around myself and walk over to the door. I peer through the peephole, see Matt in his tux.
"Who is it?" Fallon hollers from the living room.
"Just Matt," I yell back at her as I unlock the deadbolt.
"Tell him to fuck off!" she shouts.
I shake my head, exhale heavily. Why do those two always have to be at each other's throats? If I didn’t know any better...
The door swings open and I see Matt standing there, his hands in the pockets of his black dress pants, his hair gelled back, his brown eyes sparkling in the dim front porch lighting.
"Hey," I say as I step outside, close the door behind me.
"Hey," Matt smiles back at me.
"Uh...what are you doing here?" I ask as I grip the blanket tighter around myself, hear the cool breeze as it rustles through the pine trees in the front yard.
"I told you I would save you the last dance," he grins, pulls his hands out of his pockets and holds them out.
"You also promised me the first one," I remind him.
"You didn't show at Prom," he smirks. "I think you can let me off the hook for that one."
"Why are you here?" I ask again.
He looks down at his feet, shoves his hands back into his pockets. "I've been such an idiot, Jen." He lifts his head shyly, licks his lips before continuing. "I made a mistake that day in my Jeep. I should have never pushed you away. I wanted you—want you—I just...I got scared. I was terrified if we crossed that line, I would lose you if things didn't work out. I don't want to ever lose you."
I feel my heart start hammering against my rib cage. My throat feels itchy, and I blink rapidly. I've waited for so long to hear these words. I just kind of wish he had said them two months ago. "I don't...I don't know what to say."
"I told Audra we have no future together. Jen, you're the only person I want a future with," he quietly admits. "I'm so, so sorry I hurt you. I wish there was some way I could make it up to you."
"It's...fine," I whisper, still stunned by everything he's saying.
"If you're free tomorrow evening," he clears his throat nervously, "I'd like to take you on a date. A real date."
