AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“I thought you liked him,” she said. “Why not use the same name?”
“I stopped using Edwin because it was easier for us to work together and I never thought it fit me well.”
“And now that he’s passed?”
I cleared my throat. “It’s confusing for Clara.”
She made another note. Her eyes locked on me again.
“Do you see yourself as paternal towards Clara?”
I shook my head.
“Are you sure?”
I checked in with myself and shook my head again. “No, I never have. I’m her guardian, her protector, but I’ve never felt that way towards her.”
Her lids flickered. “You’re here about Clara today?”
She was so goddamn perceptive it made me wonder if she were psychic sometimes. I shifted, crossing my legs to match hers. Sometimes I mimicked her slightly because it helped me stay on equal footing.
“I am.”
“Alright,” she said crisply. “First and foremost on your mind then? Add context after.”
“I almost fucked her.”
Gretchen was a veteran, but her jaw still went slack for a second. She rearranged her face quickly and made a short note.
“Context?”
I told her about going up to the lodge and how Clara had walked into my meeting in her bikini. That fucking wet, velvet bikini. How I’d gone to her room later with the intention of scolding her and I’d kissed her instead.
And confessed to wanting to sleep with her.
I finished and took a sip of coffee. She made a few notes, her glossed lips pursed. Then she put those piercing eyes back on me. I jiggled my foot, caught in her headlights.
“I feel like there’s some context missing,” she said.
“There isn’t.”
“You scolded her. Told her you would be back at eleven. Went back out to finish your meeting. And then…what? Suddenly got horny right before you saw her again?”
I took another sip of coffee and my foot jiggled faster. She raised a perceptive brow and I adjusted my legs. Letting them stretch out so I could cross them at the ankles.
Fuck it. Gretchen knew all my worst secrets.
“I got aroused when I told her off the first time,” I said. “So I masturbated to the thought of her. I thought it would be a harmless, one time thing. I think it was a mistake.”
Her face didn’t change.
“You don’t usually come to me about your sex life,” she remarked. “Clara means a lot to you.”
“Yes.”
“You’re afraid.”
I cocked my head, waiting for her to explain.
