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“I’m not going to fuck around with you as I’m sure you have a lot of things to do. I do too. So I’m going to keep it very simple. Leave my sister alone.”
“I’m going to keep it even simpler for you. No.”
Carson’s eyes narrowed. “What do you even want with her? Wasn’t it bad enough that you broke her heart all those years ago?”
The familiar guilt pricked at me, but I refused to let it show. Carson wasn’t the one who got to lecture me about it, considering how he’d all but abandoned her to his father’s wrath.
“Oh yeah? And I assume you did so well picking up the pieces of her heart after your father threw her out of the house. I’m sure you did everything you could to make sure she was taken care of so she wouldn’t have to go back to her abusive mother.”
Carson at least had the decency to flush red at the statement. But his embarrassment was accompanied by indignation.
“At least I put in the effort,” he shot back. “Instead of you, who fucked her in a party like some kind of degenerate. And then left her to bear the brunt of it.”
“I won’t deny that I was a lowlife for doing that. A hundred percent. But I’ve never hidden who or what I am. You’re the one who puts on a façade of the ‘man of honor’ while screwing your best friend’s girlfriend behind his back.”
“I knew it. I knew it was still all about that.”
“What if I told you it was?” I leaned forward and smirked at him in that irritating way I knew he would hate. “What if I told you that I’m doing all this and using your sister to get back at you? What if I told you that she’s just a pawn in my sick games? What then?”
His face was turning as red as a tomato now, his jaws clenching hard enough to break. “It was fucking five years ago.”
“So?” I shrugged. “I got time and money now. I can do whatever the fuck I want whenever I want. Including screwing around with your sister.“
“I’m sorry,” he suddenly blurted out. “Is that what you want to hear? Then I’m sorry a second time. I was wrong for what I did. Fuck, Nick, I’ve always known I was wrong. It’s not like I set out to hurt you, either. Kim told me you guys were just about breaking up and were only fucking around together until the end of the school year before you both went your separate ways. She said you had an open relationship.”
“And you didn’t think to confirm this information with me first?”
“No, I didn’t.” A regretful expression flashed across his face. “I was an idiot, and I wanted her. Every guy with a pulse wanted Kim, and I thought I loved her. And then, when I finally started dating her, I realized what a selfish piece of shit she was and how much I’d been had. And I was an idiot for it. But believe me when I say I paid my dues. Because she wrecked me too. And last I heard, Kim isn’t doing too well either. Her father’s business collapsed, and she’s slumming it with some third-rate alcoholic. She asks about you all the time. You've done better without us. You should feel good about that.”
“Should I?” I cocked my head. “You know what, Carson? I don’t give a fuck about any of that. My problem was never with Kim. She is who she is, and it was my fault for deluding myself into thinking that she actually loved me. But you…” I shook my head. “You were supposed to be my best friend. I can’t lie about how that knife in the back cut deep. And you know what pisses me off the most?”
“What?”
“The fact that you won’t even admit why you did it.”
“I just told you—”
“You just fed me a bunch of horseshit to make yourself feel better.” I rolled my eyes, done with his sanctimonious crap. “You didn’t fuck Kim out of love or any other bullshit. You did it because you could. Because you’re Carson King. You’re young, good-looking, and rich. You can do whatever the fuck you want and screw over whoever you feel like, particularly me, someone who was a nobody from nowhere.”
Carson froze, staring at me in disbelief. I didn’t know if he didn’t believe what he was hearing, but I’d always known that Carson saw himself as superior to me, even when we were friends. And unlike him, I accepted the fact that I may have become that person too.
“My sister has nothing to do with this,” Carson said quietly. “Don’t you at least feel a little bit bad?”
I shrugged. “Sometimes. But then I remember who I am. I’m nowtheNick Walker. Rich. Powerful. And I can do whatever the fuck I want.”
Carson shook his head, disbelief and disgust in his expression. Without another word, he turned and left.
I sighed. I thought that would feel better than this. I had Carson exactly where I wanted him. I made him beg and could probably make him lick my shoes if I wanted. I also tore off the veil of his superiority to reveal the true animal that lay beneath.
But I felt hollow inside. It didn’t feel good, and truly, all I wanted to do was go and see Lisa.
But I wouldn’t. Not until I finally got these fucking obsessive feelings under control.
TWENTY-ONE
LISA
I glanced behind me for the third time as I continued down the dirt road toward my mother’s trailer. I’d parked the car in the lot, under a row of oak trees, taking extra care to make sure all the doors were locked before stepping away. Even with that, I knew I would need to come back and check on it every ten minutes to make sure no one had smashed the windows or stolen my battery.
