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She seems to understand my dilemma and sends me a somber smile. “It’s okay. You’re capable of making KH Industries all the things you ever dreamed. And it’s time to go do that. No matter what happens, I’ll be cheering for you.” She stops dancing and steps away. “I hope that, one day, you find the person who makes you happy and that the next time love finds you…you aren’t afraid to embrace it.”
Then with a press of her lips to my cheek, she leaves the dance floor—and me.
That’s it. She’s given me the green light to finish the work I started, to cinch the deal I’ve been eager to cement for two years. But I know that the minute I do, Kiera will move on, too.
This doesn’t feel right. None of it does.
But this is what you wanted.
It was, but I didn’t think it’d be hard to watch Kiera leave. I had no idea it would feel like my heart was being torn from my chest. But I can’t let my emotions get the better of me. Not here. Not now.
Taking a deep breath to steady myself, I approach Maya, doing my best to look friendly and approachable when I’m fucking dying inside.
The minute she sees me she smiles. “Jonathan. So glad you could make it.”
“Good to see you. Mind if I sit?”
“Not at all. Please do. I’ve been wanting to talk to you…”
While we exchange pleasantries as a prelude to business, I sneak glances around the reception, looking around for Kiera. I stop short when I find her standing next to Chris, smiling and looking far more than friendly. What is she doing with him? Really? Is he seriously the guy she’s going to choose tonight?
Not your concern. None of your business.
I force myself to look away and plaster on a professional smile. “Well, Ms. Thompson, should we talk about business?”
Kiera
After pushing Jonathan in Maya’s direction, I leave the dance floor. I have to walk away before I do something stupid I’ll regret. The longer I stay near him, the harder it feels to breathe. Everything in me screams to hold onto him and blurt out him how I feel.
You can’t.
Right. Who knows if he even reciprocates a tenth of my feelings? The way he’s looked at me tonight, I’d swear his emotions are genuine…but is that real or my wishful heart?
I’ll probably never know, mostly because he doesn’t want to share himself. I can’t force him. Instead, I have to look forward. Tonight is everything I’ve been working up to, the “graduation” I intended to reach all along. Now that the time has come, I hesitate. Am I doing the right thing by walking away from Jonathan? It’s no longer a question of whether I can have sex without getting emotionally attached—probably not—but whether I should even try. After all, he’s not happy. I doubt I will be, either.
On the other hand, I can’t just pine for the man. He’s not interested in more. He’s made that clear. I need to move on. Maybe something casual will be better than being alone.
I asked him to dance with me because I wanted another sliver of time with him. It was selfish, I know. But I ached to have him close to me, to be in his arms once more. I needed the closure. Then he confessed the truth about his wedding, totally shocking me. I didn’t see that coming…but it explains so much. No wonder he runs from relationships. He’s been worried that every woman he dates won’t see beyond the dollar signs and opportunities. The fact that I’m the only person outside his family circle he’s trusted to tell this secret to after so long has me utterly shook.
What did I do to earn that trust? Is there a chance he feels more for me than mere faith as a human being?
You’ve run out of time to investigate.
But even if I had more time, what would be the point? Just because he was willing to share his past doesn’t mean he’s ready to pour out his soul or give me his heart. If he was, I’d swear to Jonathan that his money doesn’t matter to me and never will. Then again, maybe he’s figured that out since I returned the shoes to him. And knowing what I know now, I’m even more convinced I did the right thing. All I care about and all I see is the caring, funny, wonderful man I fell for.
Leaving him is killing me. Maybe I should turn back. No. I have to keep going. I have to see this through—for me. There is no relationship between Jonathan and me. That’s the way he wants it.
Once I’m off the dance floor, I skim the reception. There are lots of good-looking men here tonight. The only man I truly want is on the other side of the room, fighting for his professional life. But there are others here. It can’t be that hard to pick one and go home with him. I’m sure the first time will feel difficult, but I’ll get through it, right?
It would be easier if I had some liquid courage.
I head toward the bar when I notice Chris standing near the gigantic cake, talking to some of his buddies.
He’ll do. He’s no Jonathan, but at least I know he isn’t an axe murderer. Sure, he’s an absolute douchebag who called me a bitch, but does it matter? He’s horny enough to say yes. And he’ll be impossible to develop feelings for, so he’ll be easy to walk away from.
Changing course, I saunter in Chris’s direction, hips swaying with each step I take. The minute he notices me, he smirks.
Eww. Gag.
