Page 99 of Giving Up


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“Nuh-huh, we’re not.”

I roll my eyes at her words. Just fucking, I guess.

“You’re gonna tell me big bad Jake White never spat in your mouth?” Em asks in shock.

“No!”

“And the devil incarnate Nathan White never spat in your mouth either…”

“Stop!” I chortle.

“Wow, I’m disappointed. And surprised.”

We both explode in giggles again.

“Are you sure you want this?”A male’s voice rises.

“Yes!”

“You remember your safeword, right?”

“Yes!”We hear Camila’s voice through the door. “Fucking hurt me!”

“Oh shit,” I whisper.

“I really want to know who it is!”

“Fuck!”She screams. “Fuck I’m gonna come! I fucking love you when you do that. Shit! AH! I’m coming!”

Both our eyes widen as we put our hands on our mouths so she doesn’t hear us laughing.

“I’m traumatized,” I squeak with teary eyes. “Please, let’s go back downstairs.”

She nods as she still chokes on her laughing fit. I hadn’t even realized we were still on the floor.

We both get up, but after a step, we fall face to face with Jake, Luke, Chris, and Rose at the top of the stairs. The laughing stops straight away. Mine at least, they’re all cackling from what they’ve just heard behind that door too.

It’s always so weird to see all of them together. I almost forget they’re the kings of our school. That it doesn’t matter if Emily sleeps with Luke and I’m Jake’s ex. It doesn’t matter that I got close to Rose and that Chris used to be my friend. At the end of the day, seeing them together in all their beauty and God-like selves, they seem so unattainable. They look like you need a private member club card to talk to them.

Rose’s beautiful smug smile spreads on her lips when she sees my friend and me, and I know she notices how Em looks at her. She knows she could have her in her bed without even trying.

Luke’s eyes are completely on Em but I can see he’s desperately trying to look unaffected. As if he didn’t care about her. Chris is looking at both of us with his usual impassiveness. He’s so calm for someone whom I saw take multiple shots tonight.

And Jake.

Jake’s jet-black hair is tousled as usual. His biceps are stretching his white t-shirt and he crosses his arms when his gaze settles on me. His ocean blue eyes rack over my body but he doesn’t show anything. I hate when he’s like that.

When he’s got his mask on, at least he looks happy. But when he’s empty like that, I feel emptier.

The door behind Em and I open, and Camila comes out completely disheveled and clearly just fucked. But, oh, the shock when the person coming after her is none other than Landon.

Landon.

School yearbook Landon.

The kind of guy Camila would never be seen with. Every time he comes too close to her, or someone mentions him to her she finds a way to humiliate him.

It wouldn’t be the first time I think Landon has the potential to be a handsome man. His piercing green eyes are mesmerizing. But just like a lot of teenagers, he doesn’t really groom himself and has an uneven amount of hair that doesn’t cover the whole of his cheeks yet. He looks skinny, hasn’t fully hit puberty, and he looks like he rarely washes his hair. He could also use new glasses even though they’re a designer brand. He hasn’t been near me since Jake had threatened him before we even started dating, but the fear on his face when he sees Jake shows he hasn’t forgotten about it.

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