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My hands grip the sheets, tempted to rip them into shreds. She wants nothing to do with her grandchild. I knew it, but I didn’t want to believe it. Now that the cat is out of the bag, I have no clue what to do. Cut off my mom? Probably forever? I don’t know if I can do that. I don’t know if I can deal with this right now.
“Rachel, you must know I’m not ready to be a grandparent. I’m getting married.”
I shake my head and furiously wipe the tears from my eyes. “I have to go,” I rasp.
“Rachel—”
“No. I have to go.”
Without waiting for an answer, I click my phone off and chuck it to the far corner of the bed. I can’t believe her. But why am I so surprised? She’s been like this for a while now. And it’s not all Bryan’s fault. Sure, I hate the man, but he’s not to blame for Mom’s selfish ways. If she wants nothing to do with my baby, that’s on her, not on me. Still, no matter how many times I tell myself that, it hurts.
I cover my eyes with a hand and lay down, allowing the pillows to cradle my fragile body. I sniff. Tears stream down my face while I silently cry. The bros are at work so no one can hear me anyway. However, Charlie and Lauren will be coming at any moment to give me the class assignments, which I have been struggling to stay on top of.
Mom has a point there. I’m already having difficulties with my studies. Having a child won’t make that any easier. With that thought, I sob, unable to hold back any longer. I really wish Mom was happy about my decision. I wish things could be different. It’s not fair what she’s putting me through. I’m the child. I swear, she hasn’t always been like this. I just don’t understand how she’s changed so much—unless she’s always been like this and I’ve just ignored it.
I hear the door downstairs open followed by a cheerful, “Hello!”
Charlie.
“We’re here!” Lauren shouts after the door slams shut.
I wipe my eyes and sit up in bed, trying my best to cover up the fact I’ve been crying. But, let’s face it, without even having to look in the mirror, I know my face is flushed and my eyes are swollen. And besides, knowing Lauren and Charlie, they will see through my pathetic attempt to hide the face.
“Up here,” I croak, grimacing at the scratchiness in my voice.
Yep. They’re definitely going to notice.
I hear their footsteps up the stairs and their mumbling voices. Charlie’s concerned face is the first I see, followed by a frowning Lauren. Their expressions worsen as they draw closer to the bed.
“What’s wrong?” Charlie asks while sitting next to me. She drops her bag onto the floor and dumps the stack of folders in the middle of the giant mattress.
I shake my head, but even as I say, “Nothing,” I can feel the tears crawling their way back up.
“It doesn’t look like nothing,” says Lauren while sitting on my other side. “You’ve clearly been crying.”
I sniff and my mouth trembles while I try to control a sob attempting to free itself. “I just got off the phone with my mom.”
Lauren and Charlie make a face.
“You’re still fighting, I take it?” Charlie asks.
I bob my head.
“She’s still not on board with the whole becoming a grandparent thing?” Lauren asks.
I bob my head again.
Charlie takes my hand and gives it a gentle squeeze. “I thought you decided to let go of all that,” she says softly.
“I did,” I say with a sniff while tears stream down my cheeks. “But…she said some things.”
“What things?” Lauren asks darkly, as if she’s about to leave this room and go hunt down my mom to apologize.
I shake my head. “I don’t want to repeat it.”
Charlie makes a face. “That bad, huh?”
“Yeah,” I say shakily. I run a hand through my hair, needing something to do with it. “And now…I’m starting to think she’s right about a few things.”
