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“He didn’t seem too. But therapist-client relationships are a huge breach of trust. He’s going to investigate.”
“And he’ll find nothing, Grace.” His hands cradled my face, while his thumbs wiped my tears. “I’m not your client.”
“But you were. You were the first time we had sex. And I’m not sure it will matter that you’re not anymore. They might still see it as wrong.”
“This isn’t wrong,” his voice was tight. “Never say this is wrong, Grace.”
I looked down, feeling completely defeated.
“Do you think this is wrong?”
“It’s ethically wrong.”
He dropped his hands from my cheeks, and I hated the pain and anger I saw etched on his face. He walked to his bar and poured a drink.
He downed it, his dark eyes watching me. I suspected he was trying to figure out what to say or do next. It seemed like a good time to leave, but I was glued to my spot. I couldn’t move. I didn’t want to move. I wanted to stay. I wanted him. Was I really going to let him go?
Finally, he said. “What if we just be careful? What is there for him to find out anyway?”
“He could learn you were my client.”
“No one knows we’re seeing each other,” he said. “We’ll just keep it under wraps.”
It seemed risky, and yet, I so much wanted to give in to him. As I always did.
He moved to me, and again he put his palms on my cheeks. “I won’t let anyone hurt you, Grace. I might be a little unstable in the head, but I’m a Raven.”
“You can’t stop them from looking into this.”
“Maybe, maybe not. But I can protect you. My family has connections.”
“You sound like the mafia,” I said with a wan smile.
“We don’t break knees or make people go missing, but we do protect what’s ours.”
The feminist in me wanted to protest at his suggestion that I was his, but the woman who wanted to be loved by him went all mushy inside.
“Let’s ride this out, baby. Together.”
Together. That was the word that finally crumbled my resolve. At the same time, it caused panic. I was going to give in and risk my career. But I was also risking my heart. I was putting faith in Hunter’s words that he’d be there for me. I wanted to believe him. I thought he was being sincere. But I also knew that relationships came and went. I also knew that conflict and stress could come between otherwise happy people. What caused more conflict and stress than having a relationship that could destroy one’s life’s work?
I felt a little light headed and realized I was on the verge of hyperventilating. Of all the decisions I’d made in my life, this was the biggest. Did I go with my heart, or did I listen to my head? Did I trust this man, who by his own account had bedded hundreds of women? Did I leave the man to save my career, or did I choose the man and risk losing it?
23
Hunter
Tuesday
Jesus, was I having to debate this again? Each time she wobbled on her commitment to this relationship, I had dueling thoughts. One was to convince her to stay. The other was to tell myself that if I had to convince her to stay, maybe that was a sign that this wasn’t meant to be.
I looked down into her pretty hazel eyes through her sexy cat-like glasses. I saw fear and pain. She didn’t want to do this, I decided, and so I fought for us. I needed to make myself clearer to her. While I didn’t want her to lose her license, I wanted her to know that this was more than just a sexual affair to me. Her choice wasn’t between her job and a playboy that was showing her a good time in bed. Her choice was between her job and a man who cared for her. I’d never wanted a woman like I wanted her. Not just in bed, but in life. Maybe it wouldn’t work out in the long run, but right now, I wanted her. And I was sure she wanted me.
Her breath pitched up, coming in shallow pants. If we were having sex, I’d take that as a sign I was doing my job. But we were fully clothed, having a serious conversation.
“Hey,” I said softly. “Close your eyes.”
Her brows narrowed, but I nodded for her to do as I asked. She acquiesced and closed her eyes.
I turned her around so her back was against my chest. I held her close and started controlled breathing.
“Breathe with me, Grace.” I took a long inhale, held it for a second, and then let it out slowly.
Her first breath was shallow, shuddering out of her. I pressed my chest closer to her so she could feel my breath as I inhaled and exhaled. Soon, she was in sync with me. I could feel the tension releasing from her body.
