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Bull and Tanner exchanged glances. They were clearly worried about her. At least it was a relief, knowing she’d been wrong about Bull.
After promising Bull that she’d be careful, Rose joined Tanner in the truck. “Better?” Tanner asked her as they headed back toward her property.
Rose nodded. “But I feel like a fool. I’m glad it wasn’t Bull who killed my lambs. But the idea that the monster who did it is still out there, and might be coming back . . .” She let the words trail off. The truth was, she was nervous about being alone, even with a gun.
“I’ve got work today,” Tanner said. “But do you want me to come back tonight?”
“I was hoping you’d ask.” As Rose laid her head against his shoulder, she felt her world slip back into place.
* * *
Tanner would be coming by around eight o’clock. Rose, in a reckless moment, had promised him a home-cooked meal. Her tiny kitchen didn’t allow for elaborate cooking, and Rose had never fancied herself much of a cook, but María had taught her to make a few good Mexican dishes. She decided on enchiladas, with a fresh salad from her garden. Once she’d settled on a menu, it was time to make a run to the grocery store.
María had made everything from scratch with ingredients she’d bought in the village market. She’d made the sauce, grinding dried chiles and spices in her stone metate and hand-shaping thin, uniformly round tortillas, which she laid out on a comal, a large clay griddle that let the air bubbles in the center rise up and form layers, cooking the tortillas to perfection.
Rose had never mastered the art of perfect tortilla making, but she had loved watching María cook. Now the memory brought tears to her eyes. Overcome by rage and the need to flee from danger, she had never taken time to grieve for the good couple who’d taken her in and treated her as one of their own. She remembered how María had taught her to cook and sew and even made her a pretty dress for her fifteenth birthday celebration, and how Ramón had taught her how to drive and maintain a car. Waves of grief swept over her as she realized how much she missed them. She had killed Lucho Cabrera for causing their deaths. If she could, she would kill Refugio and the rest of the cartel, too, and free the sad little village that would never be the same again.
Rose splashed her face to dry her tears. Some things could never be. And right now she had a meal to prepare for a man she had thought she’d lost for good. Now he was back in her life, but would he stay? In case the answer turned out to be no, she would be wise to hold back her heart to keep him from breaking it.
In town, she picked up dressing for the salad, a six-pack of beer, a can of prepared enchilada sauce, a block of cheese, a half-pound of cooked chicken, and a packet of tortillas that looked like cardboard and would probably taste like it, too. She would do her best to make everything taste good. Maybe someday she would have a real kitchen where she could at least try to cook like María.
By the time Tanner was due to arrive, Rose had the table set and the salad made with fresh lettuce and baby vegetables from her garden. The enchiladas had turned out all right, though they couldn’t compare to the made-from-scratch version.
But this wasn’t about the enchiladas. It was about the man who’d walked out of her life and co
me back—and what she would do if he didn’t stay.
Just when she was wondering whether she’d been forgotten, Tanner showed up in his truck—late, but barely. “Smells good,” he said, stepping in through the open door and locking it behind him. “You’ve gone to a lot of trouble.” He paused a moment, studying her face. “Are you all right, Rose? If you had a phone, I’d have called you.”
“I’m fine. Just one more loop on the roller coaster.” Rose showed him to a chair. “I’m still trying to convince myself you’re really back in town. After the last time, I thought we’d said good-bye for good.”
“So did I,” Tanner said. “I’m glad we were both wrong. But according to my boss, I won’t be here forever—just until we clear the rustlers out of the canyons.”
“I see.” At least he was being up front, letting her know he wouldn’t be around long. She could look forward to more fun in bed and another good-bye. Did she think so little of herself that she was willing to settle for that?
“Have some enchiladas.” She dished two of them onto his plate, added some salad, and opened two beers. “They’re nothing like the ones my Mexican foster mother used to make, but I did my best with what I could find.”
“They’re good.” He ate with enthusiasm. “I haven’t eaten all day.” He took another bite. “Where’s your foster mother now?”
“The Cabrera cartel shot her and her husband. I lived with them for twelve years. They were family. It’s a long story.”
“I’d like to hear it all sometime.”
“But not tonight. It’s much too sad. It’s just that making enchiladas brought the memories back, that’s all.” Rose forced herself to eat. Why couldn’t she be chatty and charming, hiding her feelings like some women could? Tonight, it was all she could do to smile.
“Sorry to be so gloomy,” she said. “I’m not good at pretending. Didn’t you say we needed to talk?”
“I did. But it can wait.”
“If you’re planning to tell me we’re just having a little fun before you leave again, I already got the message.”
“That’s not what I was planning to tell you, Rose.” He’d cleaned his plate. “Will you listen to me and try not to read anything into what I say until I’ve finished?”
“All right.” She put down her fork and put her hands in her lap. “Talk.”
He gave a slight shake of his head. “Damn it, woman, you’re not making this easy. When I left you before, I thought it was for good. I had feelings for you, but I knew I couldn’t stay, and I didn’t want to hurt you.
“My brother needed me on the ranch, so I went to Wyoming for two weeks. I thought about you every day—in fact, I couldn’t get you out of my mind. And driving back to Texas, you were with me all the way. Even so, I tried to keep my distance. I was still getting over the loss of my wife and son—and I didn’t want to be unfair to you. I made every excuse in the book, Rose. But then my boss told me I was being sent back here, and I knew I had to see you.”
