Page 65 of Drive Me Crazy

Landon turns onto our street, driving past Ridge's home. I can't help myself; I stare as we go by hoping to get a glimpse of him. A coldness washes over me and I shiver.

Scout explained to me before we left the hospital that Ridge went back to his apartment. He wanted to give me some time with my family. He can say what he wants, I don't believe it.

It's as if my brain is waterlogged and everything that's happened the past week is a strange nightmare. An ominous cloud settles over me and wouldn't leave, and I drowned in its downpour.

"Harper!" Landon's standing beside me with the passenger door opened, gazing at me.

My ears ring, making me grimace. "Why are you shouting?"

"I called your name when we turned in, and after I stopped, and then again before I got out." He stares at me with a quizzical brow. "You doin' Alright?"

I slide from the seat, brushing past him. "Yeah, just not sure why you brought me to our parents house."

"Do you want to stay with us?" Scout catches my wrist before I can make it to the steps.

I twist my bottom lip between my fingers. "No. This is fine."

"I'm sure he'll be by tomorrow, or maybe he'll call first." She forces a smile, hoping I'll believe her. I do my best to return the favor with my own.

"Sure, he will." I pull my hand free and continue into the house.

"She's here!" Dad yells up the stairs as soon as the door swings open. His arms are around me, hauling my body into his. "It's so good to have you home safe, baby."

"I'm happy to be here, Daddy." I pat his back, needing some space but knowing I can't ask this minute for it.

"Harper," mom practically knocking dad out of the way. "I can hardly believe you're home. It's wonderful to have you back."

I close my eyes, trapping the building tears. "I know, Mom. I really am grateful I'm here."

"I fully understand we're all thrilled to see her, but she's home and there's plenty of time to talk and catch up, after she's had plenty of rest." Scout puts her arm around mom, encouraging her to release me.

"I am exhausted to be honest." I run my hand through my hair, cringing internally at my request. I'm sure they all know where my mind is right now. "Is it too much to ask to wait for the Spanish Inquisition to happen tomorrow?"

Dad pecks me on the cheek. "There's no trial date set, you're free to go."

"I appreciate it. Honestly, I don't know where I'd be without all of you." I latch onto his hand, clasping it. "I'm spent, it's that simple."

Mom pushes my hair behind my ear, smiling sweetly. "You never have to explain anything to us, Harper. You've done enough of that for life."

"Are y'all trying to make me cry? I really do appreciate each of you, thank you." I kiss them both, stopping to hug Landon and Scout before I take the steps up to my room.

The minute the door clicks, I rush over to the window. I push it open, climbing out and onto the garage roof. This is nothing I haven't done a thousand times before, yet the knot tightening in my belly fools me into believing it.

Years have gone by, but I still remember how to get off this thing and around the back of the house with no one seeing me. The minute my feet touch the old path to the barn, I race toward him.

My mind keeps telling me he isn't there, but just like all the times I came home from college, I'd run down this road to the barn, praying the entire way he'd be waiting on me.

Only to be crushed when I find out he wasn't. I was alone. Just like I've been for years, hoping my life would be different and knowing it never would be until I did something about it.

The moon shines brightly as I approach the old building sitting in the clearing behind his house. As if I have a moment of clarity, the security code flashes before my eyes.

My fingers hit the buttons so hard, they tingle. My breath hitches when the lock clicks, and I walk through the gate. I stagger toward the back door, entering the new set of numbers.

"He thought of everything, down to the possibility of me not having keys to get in with and he prepared for it." For the longest time, I felt as though I was invisible, but not to him.

Or so I thought. How could he not know I would need him now, more than ever before; I want him here? I push the door open and step inside. My senses on overload, I'm hit full on with Ridge as his scent surrounds me.

"Ridge? I know you're not here, but I want you to know, I'm came back." Once I'm closed in and safe, I fall against the cool glass, sliding down it and into a pile on the floor.