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“Sasha!” Roan moved toward me, but I pushed him back.
“Go, Roan. Now.” I pointed at the car, keeping my gaze fixed on Eduard. “Do not look back.”
Defiant as always, Roan stayed exactly where he was.
Eduard exhaled a shaky breath, gritting his teeth. He glanced at Roan, but I smacked his cheek so he’d look at me. When his gaze snapped back to mine, he pushed harder with the gun, his lip curling.
“Come on, Eduard. Do it. I understand. Kill the disease before it spreads. It’s not murder, it’s mercy. You know that. End my suffering.” I tried to keep my breathing even, but my heart was racing so fast I thought it might explode. I wasn’t afraid for myself — I was afraid for Roan. If Eduard shot me, there was nothing stopping him from killing Roan in the next breath.
Eduard swore again, shaking his head and tightening his grip on the gun. “You’re fucking crazy!”
“Probably. Now either pull the trigger or put your fucking gun away.”
Time stopped.
I kept my gaze locked on Eduard’s, refusing to blink, refusing to breathe.
At last, he lowered the gun, releasing another ragged breath. “You better hope Viktor doesn’t find out.”
“I know...”
Roan crashed into me from the side, his arms around my neck. “What the fuck were you thinking?!” I barely had a chance to hug him in return before he whirled on Eduard, stepping nose-to-nose with him. “And you? You’re supposed to be his friend and youactuallythought about shooting him? What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Eduard opened his mouth to speak, but Roan kept going. “While we’re on the topic of what a fucking asshole you are — where is Katya? What did you do with her?”
“Who the fuck is Katya?” Eduard asked, glancing at me for clarification.
I gripped the back of Roan’s neck and pulled him away before Eduard reconsidered his decision not to shoot me. “She’s dead. And no, he didn’t do it.”
“What happened?” Roan asked, whirling on me.
“I shot her.”
His jaw dropped, eyes widening like I sucker punched him. “You what?! Why? Why would you do that?”
“Because I wish someone would have shot me.” My spine straightened, reaffirming my belief in my own decision, despite his horror. “She’s better off.”
Mouth agape and brows furrowed, Roan continued to stare at me, like he couldn’t comprehend anything I said. In truth, he probably couldn’t. He didn’t know the kind of life I had, the life Katyawouldhavehad. He’d merely glimpsed our world and was revolted by it. I didn’t want to imagine what would happen if he was immersed in the nightmare for the rest of his life.
“What’s the plan now?” Eduard asked in the wake of Roan’s shocked silence.
I smiled bitterly. “I’m going to arrange a meeting with Viktor and see what he has to say for himself.”
39
Roan
The rideback to my house was completely silent. Sasha was never in the mood to talk but, for once, I wasn’t either.
I might have only known Katya for a day or so, but trapped in that fucking dog kennel, it felt like a lifetime. We bonded in our fear, both held captive by people we didn’t know, for reasons we didn’t understand. I made it out of my ordeal alive. She didn’t.
Anger and sadness battled inside of me. Her death was senseless. No, hermurderwas senseless. By none other than the asshole sitting next to me, his chin propped on his fist, driving casually with one hand as if it were another ordinary day. Well, to him it probably was.
How could he be so calm? So fucking blasé about the whole thing? He shot a girl! Not some rival gang member or dickhead who got off on beating people, or even cops trying to arrest him — a scared, helplessgirl. Hemurderedher and for what? What did that prove? What did that fucking accomplish?
She’s better off.
Who the fuck was he to make that call? No, I wasn’t naive enough to think she’d grow up to be an au pair and go to college and live the American dream. But shecouldhave. She could have escaped the hell these sick pricks had in store for her and maybe, justmaybe, carved out a decent life for herself.
But Sasha took that all away. With zero remorse, apparently.
