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“Merry Christmas, sweetheart," he breathes the words into my ear.
There’s not a doubt in my mind that we are exactly where we’re supposed to be right now. There’s no way this day could go that would change that.
I look up at the house I've seen so many times before, and it's never felt so daunting.
Scuffling comes from behind Miles and I while he patiently gives me the time I need.
"Hey," he says.
"Hey," Justin replies.
For some reason, with that, Miles walks inside without me. He gives a quick nod in his brother's direction, and I know I'm not meant to follow. We've always needed to talk. To have some conversation that helps us move from where we used to be to now.
It's weird, being alone with him. The air between us is filled with feelings from the past and the present, and they're all so complex.
"I'm sorry," Justin starts. "I don't have any excuses, I just wasn't a good guy."
I take the words in, I process them. I try to see through all of those complex feelings to just right now, this moment.
None of it matters anymore. Maybe it did take this small apology for me to finally realize it, but it's the truth. The only thing that really matters is where we are now, and how we're going to move forward. It's a beautiful conclusion to come to.
Still not the best with words, he ends it there. Justin gives me a small smile, and heads up to the front door. I think for a moment that he's just going to leave me to walk in there alone, but then he pauses with the door open.
I take advantage of the small act of kindness, and walk through it.
Everything is warm hugs, and greetings filled with love. You couldn't tell that this family had just seen each other the night prior, they are still just as happy to be together now.
Amelia gives me a kind smile as she leans in for a side hug. “I’m so glad you’re here.”
“Me too,” I agree, and I squeeze her back. I'm still cautious, but I am glad. I'm relieved. I'm ready.
Miles hugs his mother, and they squeeze each other until I think one of them is going to get hurt. Thankfully, his ankle isn’t bothering him much at all today.
He comes back to me, and kisses my cheek. I can't help the smile that spreads across my face. It's so good to be loved by him.
Justin looks back and forth between us with an odd expression. Miles takes a step forward like he’s about to say something, but Justin interrupts him.
“I am fine with this,” he says, pointing between us, “but that doesn’t mean it’s not gonna be weird for a minute.”
I speak before Miles can.
“That’s fair.”
I think it would be weird if thingsweren’tweird.
I can’t help but notice just howweirdit must feel for him to be here alone. Without Isabelle, without his kids. I find myselfhoping his days of being a cheating scumbag are over so he can find the right person. As much as he wronged me, my romantic heart won’t think any other way.
Amelia runs back to her kitchen, finishing up the extravagant dinner she’s made for us. I’m distracted by that for a moment when Justin steps before me.
He surprises me by holding his arms out expectantly. I do it, I hug him, and it's not even remotely painful.
He leans in to whisper in my ear, still somehow keeping a distance given our position. “It makes sense that you end up with the better one of us.”
The words take me aback. I always thought he disliked me, hated me even, for my response to everything back then. When someone's actions make you feel a certain way, you believe them, but... wewerejust kids. He was just a kid when he cheated on me.
When Miles moves forward to take my place, I step back with a smile up at him. He looks like an absolute dream as always in his green button up.
"Merry Christmas, little brother." Instead of the hug that's being offered, he places his hands on his brother's shoulders and quickly lifts a knee that smashes into Justin's crotch. Even I cringe upon impact.
