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“Yes, you are,” Zuriel added pointedly. “And with all of those things, you will have your revenge, cousin. You need not rewrite the ending of what happened to you here today. That day is coming, and soon.”
I ceased the tapping and dropped my arms to my sides, bracing my palms against the dusty earth. “Then, I will finally be free.” Pushing myself to stand, I steeled my spine and faced the world once again.
Zuriel rose too, lithe and graceful. “Come, let’s train with the army today so you can feel just how protected you will be on the battlefield.”
Mistik was exactly where I’d left her, munching on some grass. Her head perked up, ears flicking forward as Zuriel and I approached. A soft nicker slipped from her throat as I flattened my palm on the side of her face and stroked the fur there. She bumped my belly with her nose, making me laugh. Zuriel patted her hide too. “When the war is over, you should breed horses, like High Lady Domi of the Night Realm. You have a gift with animals.”
I flashed him a smile. “I think I would like that.”
My cousin’s eyes held a sadness to them as he looked down at me, but it was gone before I could comment on it. “You ride, I will fly. They aren’t training far from here currently.”
Circling to Mistik’s side, I gripped the saddle with both hands and planted my boot in the stirrup. Swinging my leg over her back, I settled in for a short ride. “Lead the way.”
12
Iclenched my jaw so hard I thought a tooth might crack as we stoppedagainto camp with a fucking escort of Crystal Fae. They said nothing to us, but forced themselves in a ring around our tents, ensuring that we couldn’t escape into the night. The dark beast that raged in my chest begged to be released, to kill them all and satiate my anger with their blood pooling at my feet.
The crashing of the waterfalls in the distance did nothing to suppress the cacophony of my thoughts, and it took every ounce of my willpower to quiet the binding magic that nearly consumed the tendrils of moonlight in my chest. Viktor and Endre were grim faced as they sat with me near the fire. The changing of seasons brought with it cooler nights that beckoned all closer to the warmth.
Fucking Fates, a year ago we’d been preparing to launch our air assault on Vasvain, the highest peak in Északi, to rescue Izidora, and on this night I was surrounded by idiots who didn’t understand what I needed to do. Picking up a stick and working it through my fingers, I tried to give my hand something to do other than strangle the Crystal Fae around us.
They would fucking pay.
“So, Elo,” I had learned the leader of the regiment’s name at least, “how much longer until you drop us off in the Day Realm?”
The male shot me a nasty side eye, then continued stirring the pot over the fire.
“Not soon enough,” another Crystal Fae muttered in the background, intentionally loud enough for his words to drift into our ears.
Elo looked between the two of us before responding. “Only a few more days if we keep up the pace. Which I would very much like to do.”
“Tired of us already?” I mocked, not a hint of real teasing in my tone.
“Kazimir,” Endre warned under his breath, but I silenced him with a wave of my hand.
“You should be thrilled to escort another monarch. It is a great honor, after all.” I continued to goad him, wanting to get the rise I very much needed as an excuse to unleash the binding magic.
But like every night, he didn’t deign to respond to my prodding, merely filling bowls and passing them around the camp. Groups of Crystal Fae clustered together and enjoyed their meal, reminding me far too much of traveling with the Nighthounds. The thought of our group brought another wave of grief, and like every time, I suppressed the need to confront the loss of my father, Kriztof, and the twins. I didn’t have the time to deal with the heaviness of that day. I couldn’t save them, I couldn’t stop Ruslan from taking my mate, and my all around failure had caused me to lose everything – even if I’d gained a crown in the process.
Where were you, Fates?
They’d gifted me with the magic I thought would get me back everything I wanted, and yet I sat beneath the stars again insteadof ruling the Night Realm alongside Izidora. A crazed smile tried to break my face, but I clamped down on it lest anyone see the madness entombed with all my other dark secrets – like the obsession I had carried since before we ever found Izidora. I couldn’t let it go even after she broke our mating bond. My soul felt tattered and burned in a way that wasn’t reparable.
Was I upset with myself for trying to kill her? At first maybe, but not anymore. The moment she shattered our bond, I felt like a knife had dug into my chest and carved out a piece of me. The pain, the fucking blinding anguish that made me feel like I was about to die, forced me to lash out. Sure, Ruslan had been there too, but I didn’t want him to have her. He didn’tdeserveher. She was mine – to save, to have, to covet. His mongrel blood made him even less worthy of her.
The longer we rode toward the Day Realm and the other monarchs, the more I thought that maybe I was entitled to making them feel the depths of the pain they’d caused me too.
Tossing the broken stick into the dirt, I stalked toward the sparse trees that dotted the foothills. A rushing waterfall waited just beyond our encampment. As I suspected, several Crystal Fae scrambled to their feet and chased after me. I ignored them, striding straight toward the shallow pool formed by years of relentless beating from the glacial melt. Kicking off my boots, I entered the water, the ice cold biting into my bare skin as I waded deeper. Stripping off my leather armor piece by piece, I tossed them into the grass, shooting a teasing grin over my shoulder at the soldiers who followed me.
“Hope you don’t mind my nudity,” I commented, stripping off my half-soaked pants and mostly dry tunic until I was naked in the knee-deep water. The waterfall was almost like a makeshift shower, so I stood beneath it, letting the icy spray wash away weeks of grime as I faced them.
“Oh don’t be shy, come on in,” I purred at the waiting group, who shifted from foot to foot, but didn’t take their eyes off me for a second. “Suit yourself.” I shrugged, tipping my head back and wetting my hair. The pressure of the water was a little too much for my taste on top of it being freezing fucking cold, but the absolutely uncomfortable expressions the Crystal Fae wore were worth every biting drop.
When I reopened my eyes, Endre and Viktor both stood on the edges of the shore, looking between me and my guards. Viktor then looked to Endre and shrugged, shucking off his clothes and wading in to join me.
“See, we could have quite a lot of fun if you loosened up a bit,” I called out to them, but they remained stoic as ever.
Endre pressed his lips together and looked away from Viktor and me before running a hand through his hair and stripping off his armor.
