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“You know, I always wanted to do this with you,” Leo murmured, his fingers gliding over my hair. “Wash you, from head to toe, make you moan. Listen to you beg me to let you fuck me. I dreamed about it.”
I tried to swallow around the lump in my throat. “I’m sorry.”
“I know.” Leo stopped to rinse out my hair. Then he rested his chin on my shoulder. “What happened to us, Andy? What did I do that made you just stop responding to me? Was it something I said or something I did? If you had told me—”
I quickly got to my feet, splashing water over the side of the tub. “It wasn’t you, okay? It was me. I let them convince me that being in a relationship with my high school sweetheart was wrong. That I was more marketable as a bisexual, single man,and I will regret that for the rest of my life. I didn’t want that. I wanted you. The beautiful boy who always made me smile. But I was an idiot. I did what they wanted, and now I spend my days and nights miserable. Missing you, missingus, and everything we had. I shouldn’t have come here tonight.”
“Yes, you should have.” Leo calmly removed the plug in the tub, stood up, and grabbed a pink robe covered in red hearts. He slipped it on and tied the rope around his slim waist. “You needed me.”
I nodded. “I will always need you.”
“Talk to me about what’s really bothering you.” Leo moved toward the sink and began to run a comb through his dark hair. He watched me in the mirror, his eyes searching my face. “You didn’t just show up because you missed me. We’ve been in the same location numerous times, hon, and you’ve never come to see me. That kind of sounds creepy now that I’ve said it aloud, but I’ve kept up with your schedule.” He spun back around. “You used to tell me everything.”
I wanted to tell him. I wanted to tell him that my mother showed up at the show, high as a kite. She told everyone that I was her son, that I was the picture-perfect boy, and that she loved me. That she was proud of me. Proud of the person I had become.
It was disgusting.
She was a horrible woman who chased high after high, had us living in a car when I was a kid, and left me at the police station so she could run off with some guy. Part of me had hoped she was dead. I wanted to tell Leo all of this, but I was ashamed. I let her into the backstage area, let her fawn all over me, and never said a word as she acted like the mother of the year, then asked me for money. Which I gave her.
“I can’t,” I whispered, shame washing over me. I dropped my gaze to my feet and remembered I was still naked.
Leo hummed softly. “Are you tired?” I glanced up. “Want to lie down for a bit?”
“You don’t want me to leave?” I asked.
Leo reached for a towel and moved closer to wrap it around my waist. His fingers brushed over my stomach, causing goosebumps to break out over my skin. He used another to dry my hair before he took my hand again so we could go back into his room. He urged me to sit down and then Leo went to his closet, digging around until he found whatever he was looking for. He held out a pair of sweatpants and an old Mulligan Downtown shirt that I recognized. They were both mine.
“You can sleep in these.” Leo walked back over to where I sat. He dropped the clothes on the bed next to me. “I kept them, just in case you ever came back.”
I wanted to kiss him. I wanted to hold him against me and never let him go. I didn’t deserve Leo or all the kindness he was showing me. Not after what I did.
I put on the clothes and climbed into bed next to him.
Chapter Seven
Leo
I woke with Andy wrapped around me like his life depended on it. It had taken a little bit to calm him to sleep. He was fidgety. Mumbling under his breath about how he was a bad, terrible person. How sorry he was. But I managed to get him to fall asleep, my hands in his hair and his head on my chest. Like it used to be. Back when he loved me.
My heart hurt. Not just because I missed Andy, but because he was going through something he wouldn’t share with me. I had told him everything about me, including how my parents had some horrible gambling addiction. I had Googled them once, and a news story came up about how they had run off in some weird murder-suicide pact. I had sobbed in Andy’s arms. He had been there for me, and now it was my turn to do the same for him. If he would just let me.
Andy grumbled and rolled onto his back. I watched him, waiting for him to wake, but when he didn’t, I leaned closer, touching his face with the pads of my fingers. Over the stubble on his strong jaw, the curve of his lips, and then into his dirty-blond hair, remembering how he used to let me touch him for hours. I would sit on Andy’s lap, memorizing everything about him. Kissing him, smelling him. Yeah, it was kind of weird, but he didn’t complain. I think he liked it.
I love you. I love you. I love you. Come back to me, hon. Talk to me. Let me help you.
I wanted to say those words. I wanted to whisper them into Andy’s ear. But I didn’t. I couldn’t. I was still heartbroken about how he’d left me behind. Stopped responding to my texts. I wanted answers that he wasn’t willing to give me.
Tears stung my eyes as I leaned forward to rest my head on Andy’s chest. All the mornings we’d woken up like this, kissing and giggling together. The words he said to me. The things that he promised. The way we would end up tangled up in the sheets, gasping for air but never unlocking our lips. We had done almost everything except penetrative sex, but my favorite thing was kissing. Andy’s mouth was pure perfection, his tongue driving me wild.
My cock twitched inside my pajama pants. The things he did to me with that wicked tongue...
“You’re hard.” Andy’s voice was thick with sleep. Why was that so sexy?
I sat up. “Yeah, well, you know how it is in the morning.” I squeaked with surprise when Andy shoved me onto my back and splayed his heavy body over mine. “What are you doing?”
“You were always horny in the morning.” He dragged his nose over my cheekbone. “Begging me to touch you. Whining and writhing beneath me when I gave you what you wanted.”
My traitorous dick was suddenly all in. “I don’t... No, Andy.” I slapped him on his back.
