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She shook her head. “My next appointment is in four weeks. I can—we can,” she amended slowly, “do an ultrasound then, if we want to know. If you’d like to come, that is.”
My gaze flew up to hers, but I didn’t say anything.
Poppy’s cheeks were so pink as she stared up at me, her eyes so wide. God, what she must be thinking. What she must have felt, keeping this a secret for months. She’d done that to protect me if I was honest about it. And I hadn’t done a damn thing to deserve it if I was honest about that too.
Wade came through the back door, eyeing the distance between us. “Poppy, sorry to interrupt, but they decided I was the only one safe to come back here in case they heard something that would require acid to be poured down their ears.”
I sighed, rubbing a hand over my mouth. “What is it, Wade?”
“Sheila said you two had lunch plans with someone, and she wanted to know if you wanted her to reschedule.”
Poppy glanced at her watch, brow pinching when she saw the time. “Shoot, okay. I’ll be right there.” She glanced at me again. “Can we … can we talk soon? We’ve got…” Her eyes fluttered shut, and her hand fluttered to her temple while she sighed. “We’ve got a lot more to discuss that we shouldn’t get into now.”
I nodded tightly, crossing my arms again, watching her lay a hand on Wade’s arm as she passed. He kept his eyes locked on me while she did.
The silence stretched. And stretched. I exhaled heavily.
“You got something to say, Wade?” I asked.
Like he had all the time in the fucking world, Wade pulled the unlit cigarette from where it was wedged underneath his beat-up fishing hat. His favorite lighter, a bright blue metallic thing he always carried with him, hissed to life with the flick of a button, and he took a slow drag, blowing the smoke up to the blue sky.
“If I was Tim Wilder,” he said slowly, “I’d haunt your ass until the day you die.”
Pretty sure my eye twitched as I stared at him. “Thanks. That’s helpful.”
“I’m talking flickering lights. Breaking shit when you’re not looking. Wake you up in the middle of the night by giving you nightmares. All of it until you slowly lose your mind.”
I slicked my tongue over my teeth. “You done yet?”
He blew out another stream of smoke. “Greer’s ready to castrate you. Ian’s talking her down, but Cameron still hasn’t said a damn word.” He eyed me carefully. “I think you’re the unlucky bastard to be the first to rock their world since he died, you know?”
Just the position I always wanted to be in. Trigger an already protective family and launch those instincts into the stratosphere, fueled by grief and missing their dad’s steady presence.
“It wasn’t … I didn’t plan any of this. It was just one night,” I told him.
He held up a hand, eyes pinching shut. “I do not want details, kid.”
I nodded.
Wade let out a long sigh, glancing back inside the store, where the sounds of tools and conversation filtered outside. “I think you should take the afternoon, Jax. Go clear your head. Let them do the same. Maybe try to talk to Cameron after he’s done with work and less likely to…”
“Dismember me?”
“Basically.” His mouth edged up in a ghost of a smile.
Since high school, Cameron was one of the solid rocks in my life. He’d never tried to change who I was and always accepted me, flaws and all. This was the single worst way I could’ve betrayed his trust, and still, I knew him well enough to know he’d do his best not to lash out until he could get his thoughts settled.
I could give him the afternoon.
“Yeah. I’ll do that,” I told Wade.
“You do right by that girl, Jax,” he said, voice harder than I’d ever heard it. “It’s the only way you come out of this intact.”
He disappeared back into the house, and I sank onto the picnic table bench, let my head fall into my hands, and tried to figure out what the fuck I was supposed to do now.
Chapter 13
Poppy
