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I only managed to add more disappointment to the many I’ve had in my past.
The one time we went to my parents’ house for dinner, on one of my mom’s good days, Mike was arrogant and belittled my family. We’d been married a month, but I’d been thinking about leaving him since our wedding night.
When I told my father of my intentions, he talked to me and asked me to wait a little longer.
“Marriage and the coexistence that comes with it can be very difficult,” he had said.
Difficult how? I’m twenty years old and feel more mature than Mike at forty, who behaves as if the world should pay him homage the way his students do.
“Have you read the book we’re talking about, Zoe?” a very beautiful brunette asks me. I know she is one of my husband’s students.
I hardly ever stay in the States because of business trips, but I’ve had two or three dinners with Mike’s friends. All of them looked at me as if, just because I am a model, I had a pea instead of a brain.
Just one more day, Zoe,I promise myself.
I’ve waited and tried just like my father asked me to, but I can’t even bear to hear my husband’s voice. I’m getting sick again because he makes me feel like I have to thank him on my knees for marrying me when, in fact, he’s a toxic, immoral human being.
“Zoe?” I hear his voice, but I don’t turn to look at him, focused on the brunette. “I don’t think it’s my young wife’s idea of fun to read something so complex,” he says before I can open my mouth. I feel my face warming up as everyone starts laughing.
My psychiatrist told me the other day that Mike is unleashing anxiety triggers for me, but right now, it’s really ahatetrigger.
I look at his friends. People who’ve despised me since the first time we met. Teachers with spouses half their age, just like Mike and me, with the difference being that their women are respected, while I’m always the butt of teasing.
After facing them one by one, I turn to my husband, trying to strip him of the colors I painted him with before we were married so he would suit my dreams.
Tonight, the only thing I can see is a small, petty man who has to humiliate his wife to make himself feel better.
I get up from the table and grab my bag. “You are right. My atrophied model brain can’t fraternize with such brilliant minds. So, I’ll leave you to it with your average citizen’s wages while I head home to review the seven-figure contract I just signed.”
Zoe
CHAPTER NINETEEN
My legs arewobbly as I leave the restaurant. I don’t want to go back to our apartment, but my bags are there, and I don’t see any alternative.
Jesus, I’ve never openly faced a single person in my entire life, and today, I did it with six at once.
I’m not rude; in fact, I’m rather patient. However, my glass overflowed when I saw that cynical smile on his face.
Who does he think he is to judge me? I read a lot, but even if I didn’t, that doesn’t make me stupid. As my mother says, not all geniuses have diplomas.
I order a cab from the valet, and just as I get in, I see Mike coming out of the restaurant. He calls out to me, but I ignore him because, as angry as I am, I’m capable of making a scene, and I don’t doubt that someone will photograph it and print it in the newspapers.
I want to end my marriage exactly as it started: discreetly.
I have no doubt he’ll follow me because even though we’ve never gotten as far as we have today, our lives have been hell since our wedding night and the recurring fights.
It was as if, by putting a ring on my finger, he thought he had a free pass to do whatever he wanted with me.
Not anymore.
I’m just finishing up packing my suitcase when I hear the sound of the apartment’s alarm going off.
“What the hell has gotten into you today?” he asks as soon as he enters the room.
I don’t turn to face him, and I know he shuts up because he sees me closing my suitcase.
I just got back from a trip, and in theory, I should stay in Boston until the day after tomorrow before heading to New York for the meeting with my new employer. I won’t be leaving town today, but there’s no way I’ll stay with him for another minute.
