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7
Monroe
I sighed when Dom placed me in the passenger side of his car. I didn’t say anything even when he got back in the car and we drove off. I had never put my hands on my sister or been so damn angry like that before. It scared me, much more than anything else in the world and I didn’t know what to do. Dom was the first to speak breaking the silence,
“You okay?” He asked, and I had no answer. I was stuck not sure if I was okay or if I wasn’t.
I wanted to be so upset at myself for reacting that way to Essy but nothing, I was upset at the fact that she couldn’t have one shred of decency to say something so devastating to me in private. She embarrassed me and now that I had time to deeply delve into her past actions, all those instances came up. She would embarrass me no matter where we were, and it would get worse when Dom used to come around once he started to grow more like a teenage heartthrob and less like a kid. She would criticize my clothes or the fact that I had no other friends but him. Then it would be my hair, my face, my skin color being shades darker than her, and the worse one, telling me that I would never be as pretty as her and mama. None of it used to make sense to me as a kid, I always wondered why mama would just sit there and let her say those things then when I was on the verge of crying, Dom would always somehow know when to knock on the door and come ask if I wanted to play.
He was my savior in ways he had no idea about. I looked at him as I clutched my now throbbing right hand in my left. I even forgot we both still had our masks on. I just couldn’t stop looking at him and wondering why I met him again? Was it because he never really went away? He always lived in me and even if the feeling was of anger, there was still something there that kept me thinking of him when I was at the most fearful, lowest and loneliest of times out there on the street. Times when it would get so hard that I couldn’t even cry and then I would think about what we said we would never do.
“Do you remember what we spoke about right before we fell asleep on the night of…” I didn’t want to finish the sentence.
He gripped the steering wheel a bit tighter turning his tattooed knuckle a bit whiter.
“The night of my mom’s funeral? The night you told me you loved me?” He slightly turned to look at me and then back at the road.
I cleared my throat,
“Yes, that night. Do you remember what we said we would never do?” I asked and wondered if he even remembered after all this time. He was in a lot of pain that night as I held him.
“We said we would never let go of each other. Let go of how we felt about each other no matter what because what we felt for each other was real and ran so deep that no one, not even time could erase that.” He finished in a whisper.
“Do you still feel that way?” I asked him as I turned away from his face and looked out my side of the window.
Dom was so quiet that I drew to my own conclusion that he didn’t feel that way anymore. That time had changed everything, I sighed and stared as the road blurred due to my tears.
“No, I don’t feel that way anymore Monroe,” He said through gritted teeth and tears fell from my eyes to my dress, but he continued to speak. “I feel even worse.”
“Worse?” I repeated without realizing it.
“Yes, worse because I’m in deeper. I’m drowning right now and there’s no one to pull me out.”
I swiped at my tears with the back of my hand,
“What does that even mean Dom? You want me to leave or somethin’?” I genuinely didn’t get it.
He swerved the car to the side and cut the engine off. His hand roughly gripped my jaw as he turned me to face him. He ripped the mask from his face causing the neatly coiffed hair to land on his forehead. He removed the mask from my face as well. There was such crazy unknown emotions swimming in his eyes and it was making me dizzy.
“Listen to me woman, I said I’m in deep. Now, why would that indicate that you need to leave? I love you Goddammit! Yes, I love you okay? It makes no sense, right? For me to love you even though it’s been years since I’ve seen you or even spent time with you but the moment you walked into the restaurant, I couldn’t shake it. There was this yearning, this craziness inside of me that seemed to awaken the moment you smiled at me once more and Goddamn when I slid my dick inside of you baby, I almost had a heart attack. I was so overwhelmed with what you felt like on me and being inside you spoke volumes for me. I didn’t even care about protection, something came over me. Something so dark, so unadulterated. I wanted to own you, possess you, make you mine and show you off to everyone as the woman who was meant to be by my side even in death. When I made love to you earlier on, it wasn’t just about our bodies joining together, it was about me showing you what you’ve always meant to me and how much of that had grown.” His words were drying my throat and I couldn’t find the strength to swallow. He continued knocking me off my feet,
“That announcement today, it wasn’t to spite everyone well I mean I can admit I wanted your sister to know that she could never in a million years have me. She hurt you in more ways than one and that in turn hurt me. If I had known all these years that you wanted to speak to me just as much as I wanted to speak to you then I would’ve made the seas part just to see a smile on your face. The smile that you gave me at the restaurant and one that I’m making my mission to always see on your face. So, you see baby? You have never belonged to another but me. No one will ever hurt you unless it’s me when I’m giving it to you so painfully pleasurably.”
Finally, I swallowed,
“You love me?” I asked him.
He chuckled loudly as he shook his head,
“That’s all you heard from my entire speech? That I love you? Nothing else of what I said matters huh?” He gave the sexiest grin I’d ever seen in my life.
I drew my bottom lip in my mouth and nodded.
“My brain frizzed out when you told me you loved me, just like it did the first time you said it to me.”
“Babe…” He called out to me.
“Yes, Dom?”
