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I settle in his arms, resting my head against his chest. His warmth surrounds me, consuming me as I breathe in his scent. I’m out of my mind, high as shit, but I’m still coherent enough to know what’s going on; to know him. My soul knows him better than I ever will.
Killian carries me over to the pull-out couch, crouching down as he lays me down on the creaky mattress. It dips under his weight as he settles down beside me, pulling the blanket over us. He wraps his warm arms around me, enveloping me in his embrace.
“Ainsley,” he murmurs, his lips softly brushing against the back of my neck. “We gotta stop this shit before it gets too bad.”
I nod slowly. “I know. We will. I promise.”
“When, though?” he whispers, his words sounding like a plea. “When the fuck does this actually end? What will it take for you to realize that you need help, baby? Help that I can’t give you...”
His words swim in my mind. I know that I need help. I need to go into some kind of treatment if I want to actually get sober. There’s no way that it will work doing it myself, I’ve already proved to be a failure at that. I’m too weak. I’m not strong enough to fight this alone. But I’m not ready to fight, not yet.
“Just give me a little bit of time, please?” I plead with him, my voice hoarse as the emotion wells in my throat. “You asked me to trust you with my time. Now I’m asking the same from you. I need time to come to terms with it and really want it for myself.”
His breath is warm against my skin as he sighs. “You’re a master manipulator,” he mutters, gritting his teeth. “Fine, I’ll give you some time. If you take too long though, I’m taking matters into my own hands.”
“What are you going to do? Force me to get clean?” I roll in his arms, turning to face him as I laugh lightly. “You know that will never work.”
“It will if I don’t give you a choice,” he growls, his jaw clenching. “Don’t test me, baby girl. You already know not to.”
I roll my eyes and shrug, settling against him as I breathe in his scent. It’s intoxicating and my head floats as I ride the dragon. The dragon’s image is blurred though.
It’s not just the heroin anymore.
My dragon has a name.
Killian.
“No matter what happens, I need you to promise me something.” His hand finds my chin and he lifts my head to look at him. I peel my eyelids open, finding his bright green eyes burning holes into mine. “A real promise, no more of your bullshit lies.”
“Okay...”
Killian swallows. “Whatever happens, promise me that you won’t forget that I love you.”
“What do you mean ‘whatever happens’?” My eyes narrow. I’m suspicious, feeling like he’s finding a way to trap me or being sneaky.
“Because neither of us knows what the hell is going to happen in the future.” He pauses, lifting his hand as he holds out his pinky. “I just need you to promise me, please.”
I glance at his hand, my eyes bouncing back and forth between it and his face. I take a deep breath, sucking in the small amount of oxygen that my lungs expand for. “I promise,” I say truthfully as I hook my pinky around his. “I need you to promise me the same thing, though.”
“Say the words, Ainsley baby. Let me hear what you want from me.”
My throat constricts as it’s thick with emotion. “Promise me, no matter what, that you won’t forget that I love you.” I pause as my words hang in the air. “I love you, Killian. I’ve been in love with you since I saw you in the hallway that day.”
Killian stares back at me, his eyes swirling with emotion. “We’ll get out of this mess. We’re in this together, okay?”
I nod, swallowing back my thoughts as I let my eyes fall shut. There is no way out of this mess that we’re in. Killian must have forgotten what he did to Ezra and the shit storm that is waiting for him at home. We can never go back. My parents will force me to get help and Killian will end up in jail. I don’t know what we do or where we are supposed to go from here, but I don’t question him on it.
I let him have his moment of peace as he believes his own lies. I know the truth though.
We can’t go back to reality.
Reality isn’t a fairy tale—she’s a stone cold bitch and she won’t hesitate to ruin your life.
SIX
KILLIAN
Rolling onto my side, I hear the shuffling footsteps in the darkness of the night. A light flickers on as Grace’s bedroom door opens and some drunken asshole stumbles out as he struggles to button his pants. “Don’t you dare think about trying that shit again, Daniel.” Grace follows out after him with a lit cigarette between her lips.
