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“I’m not, but I want to know. You think I didn’t see you looking at me yesterday in the park?”
“That was purely because you have a hot body, not that I’m attracted to you.”
JC grinned. “Oh, so you think I’m hot?”
“We’re getting off subject.”
“It’s a simple question. Do-you-think-I’m-hot?”
“No. Happy?”
“No, because you’re lying.”
“I’m not.”
“Then do me one favor, kiss me and tell me you feel nothing.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
“Why because you’re afraid of what you’ll feel?”
“No, because I’m faithful to my fiancé. What would it prove anyway?”
“That you love me too.”
“No. I’m done having this conversation.”
I cross my arms and look out the window. I can see from the corner of my eye that JC is staring at me, but I’m not going to give him the satisfaction of meeting his gaze. A few more awkward minutes later and the cab pulls up to my building.
“JC, you need to get out so I can.”
He doesn’t move then finally slides out, once again holding the door for me. I say nothing to him as I head inside. Then he grabs my arm just before I get there.
“Have coffee with me.”
“I’m tired, and I’m done spending time with you.”
The fact is that I’m afraid of the emotions welling inside me. I do feel something for him, but it’s wrong and I need to be alone so I can reconcile them. Maybe a good night’s sleep and a rational head in the morning will prevail.
“Just one cup? Beansy is right around the corner.”
It sounds tempting, a nice cup of coffee or a latte. But it’s who I have to drink it with that worries me. I decline and leave JC standing on the street, staring after me.
Finally, in my apartment, I realize I’m breathing erratically. I’m stuck when it comes to JC. I don’t want to look for a new job, and I love Noah. I’m going to have to figure out a course of action. I undress and slip under the sheets hoping that I fall asleep quickly, but I don’t.
I toss and turn so much that by the time five rolls around, I still haven’t gotten a decent fifteen minutes of sleep. So many things rattle around in my head. In a few short weeks, many things have changed. I have a new job that’s barely a month old; I’m a stepmother, my boss is in love with me. Noah has grown distant.
It’s all a lot to take in right now. I lie on my side and look out the window. The sun is starting to rise, and I’m exhausted. Maybe I can take a nap this afternoon. Noah is supposed to be home today, but I don’t know when. Who knows when Lucian will come back? I wonder if he and Megan ended up sleeping together.
I get up and go back and forth between tea and coffee. In the end, I make a cup of ginger lemon tea. My head is feeling stuffy, and I’m hoping that I’m not getting sick. The last thing I want to do is take a day off since I haven’t worked at my new job for long. JC would probably think I was avoiding him.
I left my phone in the bedroom and can hear it going off. I hurry to see if it’s Noah, but it’s not; it’s JC.
Please tell me that you’re not going to quit.
I’m not quitting. I deserve that job, and you’ll have to behave yourself when we’re together.
Thank you.
