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Thirty-Two
It would’ve been smarterto have told him that there wasn’t a chance, that he should leave and not speak to me again. It would hurt like hell, but better to hurt now than have my heart destroyed when he inevitably reverted back to being an asshole.
And he would.
Because I couldn’t hope for anything else. It would only make things worse if I had my hopes up.
Still, I didn’t have it in me to send him away.
Which was how we ended up with a tentative agreement where he’d stay with me in the hospital, and after I was released, we’d see where things stood.
I had to admit, it was more than a little amusing to see this big, rugged man playing nursemaid. Well, not really nursemaid, since it wasn’t like I was bedridden. They just needed to keep an eye on my brain, and Jalen managed to convince the nurses and doctors that he could do that better by staying in the room with me than they could by waking me up every few hours to ask me my name.
He’d charmed them all, and I realized this was what he was like as a businessman. He might’ve been scary smart, but he also had to know how to interact with people to convince them to invest in his company or believe in what he was building. As I watched him smiling and talking to the doctors and nurses, I couldn’t help but admire the easy confidence he exuded.
Then, I thought about how he was with me. How he had been when we’d first met versus the way he was now. He’d had that same brash impudence, almost arrogance, when we met for the first time. Hell, we’d been in the middle of an argument when he’d kissed me, and he hadn’t seemed the slightest bit concerned that I might not want him. He’d always known exactly what he’d wanted and gone after it.
But now, he hesitated around me, calculating each touch, each word. He wasn’t timid, but he’d lost the self-assurance he’d once had regarding my feelings for him.
Attraction and emotions weren’t the problem though. I still wanted him. I still cared about him. Maybe more than cared, if I allowed myself to go there. Trust was the issue. I wasn’t holding a grudge about the things he’d said. I’d forgiven him for all that. But I didn’t trust him to not do it again.
Those were the things I kept telling myself as the hours past, and he worked to prove himself to me. Anything I wanted or needed, he got it, whether it was something to read or help with my pillows. It would’ve been annoying if I hadn’t been able to see how much it meant to him.
We were in the middle of a debate about the merits of rebooting television and movie series when I dozed off. A nurse woke me a couple hours later when she came in to check on me.
She smiled at me, and it took me a moment to realize she wasn’t just being friendly. Jalen had fallen asleep too, his head resting on his arm, both of which were on the edge of my bed. His other hand was next to mine, our fingers lightly entwined, and I instinctively knew that I’d been the one to reach for him.
“You have quite a young man there, Miss Quick.” She kept her voice low as she checked my vitals. “He really loves you.”
“He does, doesn’t he?” I murmured. I reached across my body to brush hair back from his forehead. Even with the scruff on his face, he looked younger in his sleep, and I couldn’t help remembering what he’d told me about his childhood.
“Everything’s looking good,” the nurse said, drawing my attention back to her. “Barring any changes, you should be cleared to be discharged in the morning. The doctor will have to double-check everything and sign off on it, but it should all be routine.”
“That’s good news,” I said with a distracted smile.
I was glad for the news, but I couldn’t deny the lump in my stomach when I thought about leaving. Jalen had been great with all this, but I’d suddenly realized that he’d proven before that he was great in these sorts of situations. He’d been wonderful when Adare had been in the hospital and even after she died. Great when he’d shown up in Indiana during my father’s trial. When he got to play the white knight, he excelled. It was the every day that seemed to throw him.
I supposed we’d see how things went later today when it was time for me to leave. With that thought on my mind, I tried to fall back asleep, knowing that nothing I did would make things more restful for me. I wouldn’t really get to do that until I was back in my own bed.
* * *
“I thinkyou should come home with me,” Jalen announced as we waited for the doctor to sign off on my discharge paperwork.
“Why’s that?” I asked as I fidgeted with the hem of the shirt I was wearing.
Jalen had run out first thing this morning and bought clothes for me to wear home. Since he’d only gone to the dollar store one block over, he’d chosen for practicality rather than fashion, and they would’ve been great if I’d been able to put them on after a shower. Yet another reason why I couldn’t wait to get out of here.
“Even if the mugging was random, the thief has your driver’s license, which means he knows where you live.”
Shit. I hadn’t even thought about that. I canceled my credit cards yesterday – thankfully, I’d had my phone in my pants pocket rather than my purse when I’d been attacked – but I hadn’t thought about the information my driver’s license would give him.
“Then there’s your father,” Jalen continued. “We both know Clay wouldn’t want you being alone until your dad’s found.”
He had another good point.
Dammit.
“What Clay doesn’t know won’t hurt him?” I made it a question.
