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Gathering my things, I tossed my jumper into Dasha’s duffel bag, ready to leave this place behind.
With a final look around, I scanned for anything missed, finding only Volk’s black crumpled shirt on the bed.
Picking it up, I brought it to my face and inhaled deeply. His scent lingered - dark wood, light whiskey, a hint of vanilla. It stirred up a mix of emotions in me, reminding me of what we did just minutes ago before he left me behind.
As I lay alone on the blanket, the crackling fireplace tickled my ears, I reached out to the empty space beside me, still radiating his lingering warmth from moments ago.
His departure inadvertently made it easier for me to leave, despite the temptation to turn back.
Doubt lingered, leaving me uncertain about what I would have said if he had stayed.
Come with me to New York?
I wished we didn’t meet this way.
I want to stay with you.
I love y-
No.
I silenced that voice in my head.
Being in love with him seemed impossible, but deep down, I knew the truth.
Just because something feels impossible doesn’t mean it’s not real.
He embodied everything I despised: arrogance, selfishness, cockiness. He pushed me to the edge, turning me into someone unrecognizable. I had never lashed out physically or yelled so fiercely before.
Yet, there was something about him.
Despite his flaws, he had a way of drawing me in. He ignited a fire inside me, challenging everything I knew. He pushed me to my limits, awakening emotions I never knew existed.
I let out a tired grunt, my mind overwhelmed with a million thoughts weighing me down.
Quickly, I grabbed Volk’s shirt and tossed it into my bag, zipping it shut with a heavy heart.
Turning away, I refused to look back at the walls holding too many painful memories.
Passing his closed door, a bittersweet realization settled in my chest.
Taking a deep breath, I adjusted the bag on my shoulder and headed downstairs.
At the entrance, Alexsei and Dasha stood waiting, bundled in coats. Dasha’s furry scarf and sleek black gloves contrasted with her trembling hands, avoiding my gaze.
She handed me a new long black coat and stepped outside.
“Volk said you wanted to see Helena,” Alexsei said, his tone detached. “Follow me.”
Silent, I obediently followed him through the hallway, passing the warm light of the dining room chandeliers and the lingering scent of chamomile tea in the kitchen.
Outside, Alexsei led me to the garden, where I quickly pulled on the coat against the icy wind. The biting cold made me catch my breath.
Through the window of the small cabin, a flickering candle awaited.
“I’ll wait outside. Make it quick.”
With shaky hands, I opened the door, anxiety through the roof.
