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I don’t know a ton about kids, but I know how busy Beck’s two keep him and Rachel. I know when they’re first born, it’s all sweet bliss and sleepless nights, but then they grow into actual people with opinions and voices and backtalk.
What would it be like to raise one of them? Would I be any good at it? Is anybody any good at it, or are they all just winging it?
Beck and Rachel seem to have it down pat. When I have kids someday, I want to parent the way they do.
But that also means I need a partner who also wants to have them someday. Is that Grayson? Or am I just chasing down a dream that doesn’t have any possibility of coming to fruition?
Tears fill my eyes as emotion seems to get the better of me.
“She’s so beautiful,” I say to Jolene, who smiles at me. I glance over at Grayson, and he’s watching me intently, with something akin to curiosity in his eyes. “Would you like to hold her, Uncle Grayson?”
“Oh, uh,” he says, and he shifts a little on his feet. “I, uh—”
“Dude, it’s fine,” Lincoln says, slapping his brother on the back. He gently takes the baby from me. “Wash your hands, then sit, and I’ll hand her to you.”
Grayson follows his brother’s instructions, and I can’t help but feel a twinge of something in my belly as Lincoln hands the baby to his brother.
I feel myself falling deeper and deeper, and that’s terrifying.
Sure, he admitted he has feelings for me. He even went so far as to tell me he masturbated last night while thinking about me.
But he’s also dead set against anything ever really happening between the two of us, and I’m terrified he’s stubborn enough to stick to that forever. I’m only setting myself up for heartbreak.
On the other hand…what if it works?
What if my persistence pays off and I end up with everything I ever dreamed of?
I have to believe it’s worth the risk.
The door opens, and a nurse walks in. “Time to check the baby’s blood sugar,” she says cheerfully.
Grayson hands Josephine back to Lincoln, and they prepare to do their little test while Grayson and I head back to the waiting room with his mom. A man and a woman who look vaguely familiar are standing there with a little boy, and Mrs. Nash runs over to them.
“Joanna!” she exclaims as she grabs the woman into a hug.
“Have you met her?” Joanna asks, and I assume this is Jolene’s parents.
“She’s precious. So perfect!” Mrs. Nash says, hugging Jolene’s dad next. “The nurse came in, so we gave them some time. I’m sure Lincoln will be down to take you in soon.”
Mrs. Nash makes the introductions between us all, and I learn the boy, Jonah, is Jolene’s son and Lincoln’s stepson. We all chat for a few minutes when, sure enough, Lincoln comes back.
“I’m going to run down to the cafeteria for some water,” I say to Grayson. “Need anything?”
“A cup of coffee would be great. Just black.”
“You got it,” I say.
“I’ll come with you,” Mrs. Nash says to me.
Grayson glances at me to make sure that’s okay, and I nod and smile. He heads down the hall with Lincoln, Jonah, and Jolene’s parents, and Mrs. Nash and I turn in the opposite direction.
“It’s so good to see you, sweetheart,” Mrs. Nash says to me. She squeezes my arm.
“You, too, Mrs. Nash,” I say, leaning into her a little.
“Stop that Mrs. Nash silliness. Call me Missy. And it’s just us girls now. Tell me what’s going on with you and my boy.” She hits the button to call the elevator.
I giggle, not sure how much to tell her. So I dodge it instead. “That’s probably a better question to ask him.”
