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I can’t even believe he’d think I could hate him. Shocked, yes. But hate, no.
Me
Hey. I crashed last night and only just saw your message. I could never hate you so don’t even think that. Talk soon. I’m thinking of going down to Atlanta for a few days.
Brookie
What for?
Me
You know what for, Kirk lives there
Brookie
Hmm
Me
Don’t hmm me. Will you look after Blake and Noodle for a few days?
Brookie
I guess so, if you really must go
Me
I must. And thanks. I’ll let you know soon if I’m going
That was a couple of days ago. I let Brook know yesterday I was going to drive down there today and head back in two days. I’m dropping Blake and Noodle at her grandparents and Brook will collect them after work.
I guess I am kind of avoiding running into him until I get back.
I’ve had strange feelings since finding out about our non-divorce.
I need to talk to Kirk and see what he thinks. I don’t feel good about keeping this from him for very long. We haven’t had sex yet, but we’ve been getting closer each time and more and more intimate. I wanted to take things slow and he’s been very understanding. It’s been a while for me. The last guy I hooked up with, things weren’t great. It kind of put me off trying again.
I’m thinking tonight might finally be the night that Kirk and I finally spend the night together, and I can forget about this non-divorce business, at least for a while.
That’s if Kirk doesn’t blow his stack — he can be a little weird about Brook. He hasn’t directly said it, other than that he thought Brook was challenging him at Blake’s birthday, but I think the feeling is mutual between them.
I put it down to boys being boys, even if they are grown men. Do they ever really grow up?
None of it matters anyway. I’m ready for the next step with Kirk… Or at least, I think I am.
I tell myself that this is what adults do; take things to the next level.
The niggling feeling inside about Brooklyn is only because of this recent stir.
I ignore the fact that I’m digging up the past again. After the shock wore off some when I got home, I started thinking about our wedding night and how magical it was. That whole barn episode was totally hot, it has always had my panties in a twist.
And it’s wrong… again because I have a boyfriend, and also the fact that Brook and I together is such ancient history. I haven’t thought about him like that in years.
The spark has always had the potential to be there, and there are times I’ve wondered what could have been if we’d stuck it out. There’s also times I’ve questioned the fact we were crazy to let it slip away when we have such a good friendship.
I thought that’s what he wanted; or what we both needed to move on with our lives. To do other things.
He can be cheeky and flirty, but I thought he was like that with everyone.
