Page 2 of When I Was His


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Financial stability was important to not just my brother but all of us. Though my mother was secure after my father died, we all felt insecure without him. He handled most of the financials and investments.

I shrugged. “Anders is proud of him. It’s what he’s been preaching to us all these years.”

“What about you? Are you splurging on anything?” she asked.

“Maybe some furniture.”

Sadie bit her lip which I’d come to recognize as a coping mechanism.

I caught her gaze. “What?”

“You said we would wait until I had a couple of paychecks under my belt.”

“Why can’t you just allow me to buy the furniture?”

“Because it’s our place and I want to split the cost.”

I chuckled. “You’re a pain in the ass.”

“But you love me. Let’s go back to sleep.”

She slid under the covers and turned out the light above her head, leaving me in darkness. I leaned back against my pillows and looked at the ceiling. I couldn’t sleep after the nightmare. It was just after 4 am and we had nothing going on for the day. I decided to grab my phone and text Ty.

Tyler Barnes was my next-door neighbor when I was growing up. He was twenty-five and a detective for the NYPD. He’d been with the department for almost five years. It was obvious Ty still had a crush on me, but I wasn’t interested, at least that’s what I told him. We were only three years apart, discussed it and decided it was better to be friends.

He often visited me at my dorm on his days off, and we’d go to the park or have lunch. He usually worked the night shift, and I texted him to see what he was up to.

What are you doing tonight?

Working on some paperwork. What’s up? You’re awake early.

Had a nightmare.

Ty was well aware of my nightmares. We shared a tent several times when our parents took us camping and I woke everyone up with my screams. It was probably because Ty told me bears came around at night and I was scared. My phone vibrated with his call, and I went out into the hallway, answering just as I got to the lounge.

“You had a nightmare? I thought you were over those?” he said with concern in his voice.

“I still have them occasionally.”

“I wanted to talk to you about something.”

Ty’s voice sounded serious, and I braced myself for what he had to say.

“Tell me.”

“I pulled your father’s file.”

My chest felt heavy at his words. My father’s murder was never solved and had become a cold case, and I wasn’t able to provide much information since I didn’t remember anything. What I’d never told anyone was that I had seen the man’s face.

In my nightmares, I always try to see it again, but his image never crosses my vision. It’s frustrating but after all these years, it probably wouldn’t make a difference.

“Why are you dredging up the past?” I squeaked.

The last thing I wanted was to bring this to the forefront. My mother and brothers were settled and pulling it back to the surface could cause problems.

“Because it’s an open case. A lot of detectives work on cold cases in their spare time.”

“But why my father’s?”

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