Page 50 of Hawk


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As if in a dream, I notice Ruby approaching the bed. She looks fearless when she sits on the bed and grabs my mother’s hand into hers.

“Miss, you shouldn’t…”

Ruby turns to look at Mrs. Clarence.

“What is her name?”

“Mary…”

That is all Ruby seems to need. She turns back to look at my mother. She just pats her hand for the longest time while my mother continues to yell out my name. There is panic in her voice, like when you see a parent frantically looking for their kids at the park.

Before long, Ruby runs her hand up and down my mother’s arm, and finally, she reaches her face. I hold my breath as I wait to see blood being shed. Instead, the second my mother feels Ruby’s soft touch on her skin, she calms down in an instant.

“Hi, Mary,” Ruby whispers, her voice ever so soft. “I saw Hawkeye today…”

My mother turns her head to look at Ruby. For the first time in months, her eyes actually look focused. The clouds have lifted.

“Where is Hawkeye?” she asks in a strong voice.

Ruby licks her lips nervously. For a moment, she looks like she wants to ask for Mrs. Clarence’s help, but then she decides to go with her instinct.

“Hawkeye went to school, Mary.”

My mother instantly relaxes against the pillow. Her lips turn into a smile, and I am floored. She’s never looked happier or more beautiful.

“Hawkeye is smart,” she says. “Like his father. He’s got Alan’s smarts.”

“Yes, he sure does,” Ruby agrees with her.

My mother’s hand clutches at Ruby’s. “Will you watch him for me after school?”

“I… yes, I’d love to,” Ruby responds.

“Good,” mom pats her on the arm. “That’s really good. I have to go to work. He can’t be alone. He’s just a little boy.”

She continues talking like this for a solid fifteen minutes. At some point, she looks like she is about to fall asleep, the meds finally starting to work. Mrs. Clarence looks speechless.

Ruby rubs my mother’s hair for the longest time. When she tries to stand up, my mother’s eyes snap open.

“Hawkeye,” she whimpers. “Where is Hawkeye?”

“Shh, he is here with me, Mary,” Ruby whispers and continues rubbing her hair. “I’ll take good care of him. I promise.”

Five more minutes, and my mother is finally in a dead like sleep.

“That was amazing,” Mrs. Clarence whispers from next to me. “We tried that with her. She didn’t care for any of the nurses. If anything, they got her going more.”

My eyes go to Ruby’s. She seems to be in as much shock as I am. She rushes to my side.

“I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me. I just couldn’t let her suffer like this.”

I stare at her until it becomes uncomfortable. Then, I turn to look at Mrs. Clarence.

“She’s staying here.” I point at Ruby. “I’ll be out of town for a while. Ruby will stay here with my mother until I get back.”

Mrs. Clarence looks taken aback. So does Ruby.

“Mr. Paulson, this is completely against the rules. While I’m sure Ruby is a very lovely person, she is not qualified to work in our facility…”

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