AllFreeNovel
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Dinner is low key. The four of us pile into Blake’s cozy living room with its overstuffed sofas and warm wood furniture. We use chopsticks and eat from the containers while watching an animated movie about dogs plotting to rescue their stray friends from the villainous dogcatcher.
“It’s not as bad as some movies they’ve picked.” He tilts his head closer when he speaks.
“I’ve suffered through far worse with Maya,” I agree. We’re sunken into the plush sofa, my upper arm resting against his warm, muscular one.
And I’m not anxious.
I’m so pleased with my progress, I feel playful. I frown, staring past him. When he turns to see what I’m looking at, I swipe a snow pea from his container with my chopsticks. He looks back just in time to see me putting it in my mouth.
He grins. “So that’s how it’s going to be?”
I deliberately crunch the crisp vegetable. “Tastes better stolen,” I say impishly, licking sauce from my lips. “Besides, it’s your fault. I love meat and green stuff with brown sauce. You tempted me.”
His gaze lingers on my mouth, and my heart pounds erratically. “You find me tempting?” His voice is low as he leans closer, then stops, testing my reaction.
He’s close enough for me to smell his cologne, close enough to feel his warm breath on my skin. Warm eyes hold my gaze. I bite my lip, and my heart gallops, but I’m not afraid. Not exactly.
A sexy grin spreads lazily across his face, making it hard for me to think. “There’s a penalty for stealing, you know.”
I wonder briefly what sort of penalty he has in mind, thankful he can’t hear my hammering heart. When he leans even closer, I stop breathing altogether.
While he holds my gaze, distracting me, he steals a broccoli floret from my container and pops it into his mouth, grinning.
Relief and disappointment battle again as he sits back without ever touching me. Apparently, my body and mind can’t agree on what they want.
I sigh and concede defeat on the stolen food front. “Well played.”
He winks. “I play to win.”
It’s only later, when I’m showering, that I can untangle my ball of messy emotions.
There’s fear, but not of Blake himself. I may not trust him completely, but I'm not afraid of him doing anything to me. My fear is just a reflex, a habit I need to break.
There’s also a growing attraction. That’s encouraging. I haven’t felt attracted to anyone since what happened to me.
And there’s disappointment.
Despite my progress, I’m disappointed with myself. Now that I’m away from the situation, I can admit that deep down, I wanted Blake to kiss me, but I succumbed to fear. Granted, it’s not like he tried and I pulled away or panicked, but I could have leaned forward and kissed him. I didn't, though. I let my fears rule my behavior.
Willow’s instructions rattle around in my head.
Be affectionate with Tom and Tucker to become more comfortable with Blake. And fantasize about kissing Blake so I don’t panic when it hopefully gets to that point.
Wait – hopefully? I’m so startled I knock over my shampoo bottle.
I’m looking forward to kissing Blake.
Warmth floods my chest, and I smile. Baby steps.
MARK
Charlie’s in a better mood than after her date with Blake last week, but something’s still not right. Something about seeing him always leaves her rattled.
She flops beside me on the sofa, her head on my lap as she faces the television. I mute the baseball game I’d had on in the background. “Wanna talk about it?”
“Talk about what?”
“Whatever’s bothering you.” She opens her mouth to deny it, but I shake my head. “Don’t even try. If you don’t want to tell me, fine, but don’t pretend nothing’s wrong.”
