AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Sorry I didn’t get there sooner, but Mum was quizzing me.”
My gut lurches again. “What did you say to her?”
“Nothing much. That you hadn’t been feeling well all morning, and you had some history with Connor around Camden.”
“What do you think Carly made of it? Do you think she knows about me and him?”
“I think he’s going to have some explaining to do, but that’s their bag, not ours.”
I look out of the window, grateful again to be out of there. “Yeah, it is.”
I despise the pang I get in the ribcage as the adrenaline begins to wear off.
“He must have really played me down to her, or she’d have known who I was from a mile off. All those years together, and he wrote them off as nothing, just to get a piece of her. I just… it’s hard to believe.”
“Hard to believe what a piece of shit he is?” Josh looks at me. “Yeah, I’m with you, and I was in the same boat myself with Amy. It took me a long time to realise just how much of a cheating bitch she was when things were over. Stuff came out of the woodwork from other entertainers. People that knew her. Apparently, it was my fault, not just hers.”
“Yeah?”
His jaw tightens. “Yeah. She painted me in a bullshit light to stay friends with people after she ditched me. She told them we’d been on the rocks for ages. It sure was news to me if we were. I hadn’t got a clue.”
There’s such solidarity between us in our fucked-up situations. Hell knows what Connor was saying to Carly about me when he was getting involved with her, or more specifically, the lack of mentioning me. And who knows how long he was doing it for? Was he organising date nights with her every chance he got, safe in the knowledge that I’d be stacking shelves through a lot of his gigs?
I try not to dwell on it, but it’s hard. I feel the lump in my throat once Beaconsfield is behind us – my wall of steel melting away, but I don’t want to give the prick even one more drop of my pain.
Josh knows I’m struggling as I stare out of the window, and he gives my knee another squeeze. I try to fight the hurt, but it’s a bitch waiting to strike. I try to suck in a breath, but it chokes me. The lump in my throat won’t go away.
“It’s alright,” Josh says. “It’s ok to get upset, Ells. Don’t try to brush it off like it doesn’t matter.”
“It shouldn’t matter,” I choke. “I hate him.”
“Yes, but you didn’t hate him when he was fucking my sister behind your back, did you? You loved him.”
“I did more than love him. I worshipped the ground he fucking walked on, the stupid arrogant prick.” I shake my head. “I still can’t believe he did that to me.”
“I still can’t believe Amy fucked me over like a callous bitch either, but I’m glad she did,” Josh says, and his eyes are so fiercely green when he flashes me a glance. “Or I wouldn’t have met you, would I? I’d still be in love with a liar incapable of giving a shit for anyone but herself and her own fucking fantasies. Good fucking riddance.”
I admire Josh’s profile as he drives, remembering how he barged into the bathroom and pulled me close to him while Connor and I were battling. I remember how many times he squeezed my knee under the table while I was trying to get through dinner. I knew the offer was there to get out at a moment’s notice, all I had to do was say the word.
Such strength. Such respect.
The lump in my throat disappears as I stare at my new boyfriend, because Connor isn’t worth another single drop of my tears. He isn’t worth shit. Josh is right about our exes, too. I’m glad Connor was a lying, cheating, self-obsessed prick, or I wouldn’t have met Josh. And I wouldn’t be an entertainer, either.
“Good riddance to bad rubbish,” I say and smile at the man beside me. “Both Connor and Amy can go to hell as far as I’m concerned. And Connor can come to Sunday dinner as much as he likes. That piece of shit isn’t going to ruin your mum’s carrots for me. I can see where you get your chef skills from, by the way. Can’t wait to sample her apple crumble as well as her tiramisu. Georgia was raving about it.”
He grins. “Can’t wait to experience your mum’s steak and kidney pie, either. I’ll ask her for a cooking lesson when she arrives. I suck with pastry. Always have.”
“Nah, you don’t suck at anything. Ever.”
I adore his laugh. “That’s not quite true, baby. I suck plenty. Mainly dicks, of course.”
“Yeah, well, I can rival you on that today.” I hold up three fingers. “I’ve got a three on one booking later, in case you’d forgotten.”
He gives me a side eye, with a filthy smirk. “Forgotten? Hardly. I should be shaking Connor’s hand to be fair. We might have lost out on a decent few hours of preparation time if the tosser hadn’t been sitting on the other side of the table.”
“You’re going to help me prepare for later, are you?”
“You could say that, yes.”
