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“Fine,” I answer automatically.
Her hands leave my arms to grab my face, so I have no choice but to look at her. This is the second time in less than twenty-four hours that she’s done this. “No. You don’t get to shut down again. How are you really feeling?”
I take a deep breath. “I feel like I just had a run in with my dad. Like I was twelve years old again. I don’t think I’ve told him off like that since then.”
Millie wraps me in a hug, and it’s the final straw. Everything I’ve thought and every feeling I’ve had bottled up for months, years even comes out. Millie listens to it all, even when I apologize over and over for rambling so much. She just rubs my back and listens.
She really is too good for me, but I’m grateful she doesn’t think so. And I’ll do anything I can to prove to her that I’m worth the cost.
“What happened to you?” Nick says as I walk into the locker room Saturday.
So much has happened the last few days I had almost forgotten the full-on brawl I had with Jonathan. I’m surprised more people haven’t mentioned my still slightly bruised face. When I looked in the mirror this morning, I hardly registered the greenish-yellow tint along my jaw. My brother can undoubtedly pack a punch. Considering how sore my knuckles have been, I know he’s most likely sporting similar battle scars. I still haven’t talked to him since our fight, unless you count the warning text he sent me two days ago. I didn’t even send a real reply, just a thumbs up emoji. Who even am I? This week has been far too draining. “It’s nothing.”
“None of my business, but it doesn’t look like nothing.”
“Just a misunderstanding.” Millie says that she and Jon have talked about things, but since he and I haven’t, it’s the least complicated way to put it. The high school locker room is not the place to be talking about how I’ve been secretly dating my little brother’s best friend and he didn’t react well when he found out.
“That’s some misunderstanding.” Nick grimaces. “I at least hope Millie’s been taking care of you.” I furrow my eyebrows. “Don’t look at me like that. I saw the way you two were looking at each other last week when you were coming to practice. Not to mention the rumors.” A smile quirks up. “You two didn’t think you could make out on a high school campus and no one notice, did you?”
“No. I guess not.” I sigh. “So, basically, the whole town knows now?”
“Ridgeview has a pretty large population so I doubt it’s the whole town, but since the Winterses and Jacobsons are basically Ridgeview High royalty, yeah, everyone here knows.”
I sigh again.
After a quick pregame warm up and an inspirational thought by Nick, the boys are out on the field. The stands are full. I scan the stands quickly for Millie, but she’s not there. It’s still early so I’m not worried. I know she’ll be here.
Bottom of the fourth and it’s our turn to bat. I scan the crowd but still no Millie. Maybe she went to go talk to Jon? She mentioned last night that she wanted to stop in on his rehearsal before coming to the game. She could have lost track of time.
Seventh inning stretch. Still no Millie. Something is wrong. She wouldn’t just not show up. She’s been talking about this game since I accepted the position. There is no way she would miss it. She knows how hard it was for me when Jack would miss a game. She was there when Natasha didn’t show up to Ben’s wedding. Millie shows up for things, she always has. She promised she would be here so she wouldn’t just not show up.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see hands waving in my direction. I look and see Jon calling me over. I stare at him for a moment, but something’s off. I jog over.
“It’s about time. I’ve been waving my arms like a lunatic.”
“Sorry. I’m a little busy at the moment,” I say sarcastically.
“You don’t have your phone on you, do you?”
I point to the field. “Again, I’m a little busy at the moment.” I’m starting to get agitated. Not necessarily at him. I’ve just had way too many emotions come up to the surface this week and I don’t have it in me to screen my tone of voice. Unless—something is wrong. Is it Mom or Rosie? Millie? My heart sinks at the thought. If something happened to her while she was on the way to my game, I’d never be able to forgive myself. I’m spiraling, and I know it, but Jon is taking way too long to say something, and I seem incapable of saying anything out loud.
“Millie called.”
“Is she okay?” If she called, then she’s okay, that means she’s okay, right? She has to be okay. I need her to be okay.
“It’s Dan. He’s in the hospital.”
Everything around me disappears. I zero in on Jon. “What happened?”
I’m already walking off the field. Jonathan races to catch up with me.
“The message said he and Norah were at the hardware store when he collapsed. All Millie said was that she was on her way here when she got the call and that she was trying to get ahold of you but that you were probably on the field already.”
I pat my pants, but I don’t have my phone or my keys. They are in the locker room way on the other side of the field. I need to get to the hospital, now. This is Dan. This is the man who taught me how to drive, how to shave. This is the man that dropped everything and flew all the way to Texas so that I wouldn’t be alone when I had surgery. He might not be my biological father, but he’s the only real dad I have ever known. I need to be there.
I look at Jon. “Do you have your keys? Mine are in the locker room.”
He nods. “I’m right over here.”
