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I sulk onto the counter, “I swear most of them didn’t even know it was my birthday. They just thought it was some office party until the speeches started.”
Todd’s eyes go wide, “Speeches? As in more than one?”
I lift my head from the counter, “Yep.”
“Ah, man, I’m sorry. That’s rough.”
“Not even the worst part.”
“What, was Jack there or something?” After living together for almost nine years I don’t have to explain why my dad showing up in anyway makes things complicated. He’s seen it firsthand and thankfully doesn’t ask too many questions just lets me say what I want to say and then moves on.
“Not physically, but I did find out that he not only went to Yale with one of my bosses, but they got together and discussed my interview.”
“No!”
“Yep.”
“Man, just when I think he’s done everything he does something else.”
“Same.” And just like that Todd knows that I’m done talking about it and changes the subject.
He pushes a box towards my head which is back on the counter, “This came for you earlier.”
“What is it?” I ask.
“How should I know? I didn’t send it.”
“Who’s it from?”
“Do I look like a shipping label to you? How should I know, the box was at the door when I got home so I brought it in.”
I inspect the box, but I don’t recognize the address and it doesn’t have a sender’s name. I decide not to open it, like everything else I’ll get to it later. Right now I just want to be done with today. I take it with me and head to my room.
As I lay on my bed I can’t stop thinking about that stupid box. Who sent it? What’s in it? I finally give in to my curiosity and go and get a knife from the kitchen to cut through all the tape.
Inside is another box covered in zip ties. What the heck? After finally cutting though what had to be fifty zip ties, who just has a bunch of zip ties laying around? Underneath all those zip ties is more tape. I finally get through all of that tape to open the box to find another box. What is going on? I’m done. I don’t even care anymore. But I do! Dang it! Whoever sent this is evil. After three more boxes within a box and what had to be a full role of tape, I finally see what’s inside. It’s a card. All THAT for a card.
Happiest of birthdays Mark! I know you hate them, so I had to make it exciting somehow. Hope you enjoyed your day in spite of yourself.
Love, Millie
P.S. I was going to send muffins, but I didn’t want to risk you not opening this and them getting all gross because that would be a serious waste of perfectly good muffins. So here is a picture of muffins you could have had if you weren’t such a kill joy.
I can’t help but smile. All the stresses of the day melt away.
Mark: How much tape did you end up using?
Millie: You opened it?!
Mark: Yes, I opened it. Wouldn’t want to miss out on a prime food picture.
Millie: That’s what you get for being a Birthday Grinch.
Mark: Thank you for the box.
Millie: You’re welcome.
Millie: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
