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She bites my lip and then pushes me away. “You do not get to get out of this conversation by going all alpha and kissing me.”
“What if I postpone the conversation?” I say, my face right near hers. Our bodies are pressed against each other so close, my weight is pinning her to the door.
I don’t move to kiss her, instead waiting for her to make the first move. I need her to do it. As we stand there panting for a few beats, she says, “We’re having this goddamn conversation, but after you get me off,” and pulls me to her.
Our kiss isn’t sweet. Instead of having a fight with our words, our mouths are doing a different kind of battle. She moves back, breaking the kiss, and reaches down for my belt, undoing it without breaking eye contact. She’s so beautiful, especially when she’s mad, her gray eyes like the ash from a raging fire.
What happens when fire meets iron?
Someone must bend, waver to the other, and it’s not going to be me.
I carry her to the bed, strip her down until she’s in nothing but her black panties, and then slowly remove the rest of my clothing while staring down at her. She does the same with her panties. Her chest lifts with every deep breath, the tension between us filling the room, and making the air thick with desire.
Now that we’re both naked, I kneel on the bed and stare down at her, admiring her body. She is perfect. I wonder if she knows just how much.
She gets impatient and sits up, all but jumping on me and kissing me, pressing her body against mine and wrapping her hands around my nape. I hold on to the globes of her ass and lift her so she’s sitting on my lap, and she wraps her legs around me. I can feel her wetness, and it makes me even harder.
“Make me feel good,” she says, and I push back down on the bed and prepare to feast on her. She lies back, giving me her fuck-me eyes, and I lick my way down her body. I’ve never been hungrier for her, and after she comes three times, she stops me from giving her more.
“Have me,” she says into my ear after pulling me to her, digging her nails into my back, so I give her what she wants and slide my cock inside her. Slowly at first, and then she turns over and starts to ride me hard and fast, while I hold on for dear life and try not to tumble backward off the bed and onto the floor. My head falls back, and she kisses my neck, biting and sucking, and I don’t even care if she leaves a mark on me.
When we’re about to fall off the mattress, I push her back on the bed, still inside her, and fuck her hard, just how she likes it, hitting that sweet spot until she’s moaning and saying my name. I put her legs on my shoulders and go inside so deep, and when she comes, her thighs trembling as wave after wave of pleasure hits, I can’t help but follow suit, looking into her eyes. I love that she gives me eye contact right back, never getting too intense for her. I gently remove her legs back down and stroke her face, kissing her lips, until I roll off her.
We lie side by side afterward, still naked, but no longer angry. I know that communication isn’t my strongest skill, nor is being vulnerable, but if I want this woman, I have to listen to her and make her happy. If that means sending her a fucking message telling her what I’m up to, then so be it. If I want to keep her in my life, I need to be able to compromise, and become the man that she wants me to be. I’ve never been in a serious relationship before, so I know that it’s going to mean some change for me. I need to stop being so stuck in my ways and let her in.
And for her, I think I can do that.
“I’ll do better,” I say, reaching out and tucking her hair back behind her ear. “And text and call you to let you know what I’m up to.”
To some extent, anyway. Most of the time she wouldn’t want to know what I’m up to, because she’s a good person and has morals, unlike me. I’d never want her to know the things I’ve done and the things I’m capable of doing. She would probably never want to see me again.
“Okay,” she says, a small smile playing on her lips. “That wasn’t so hard, was it?”
For a normal person, no, that wouldn’t be.
And I might act relaxed on the outside, funny even, but underneath and inside my head it’s a whole different story. I’m complicated, dark and not used to letting people in.
“I’ve never had a proper relationship,” I admit, kissing her forehead. “So you’re going to have to be a little patient with me.”
Any women I’ve slept with has been casual and pretty one-sided, with me in control of when and where I saw them. There were no emotions involved, just lust and desire. This. This is something different.
Which can make it a little fucking scary at times.
I’m completely out of my comfort zone, because I really do care.
And it makes it hard.
And let’s be honest, I didn’t grow up seeing a happy marriage between my parents. And sometimes that makes me not trust myself. I keep saying I’m nothing like my father, but at the end of the day that was all I knew and saw. He was a monster, and the apple never falls far from the tree. At least that’s what they say.
Sometimes I wish better for Bella, but I’m too fucking selfish to let her walk away.
“River, I’ve been nothing but patient,” she says, running her red fingernails over my bicep. “But we’re together, and I know you are used to doing your own thing, but you have me to consider, too.”
I imagine her watching Julianna get married and now pregnant probably has her reexamining our relationship, which is still pretty casual. We haven’t moved forward at all since we first started dating, although we did become exclusive with each other, without ever discussing it.
I really do suck at all of this.
“You’re right,” I reply, swallowing hard. I roll her onto her back and lie on top of her, my hard cock pressing against her. “But don’t try to make me jealous again, because if you were with another man, it wouldn’t have ended well for him.”
