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“You told me we were each other’s everything.”
“You are my everything.”
“But you never thought my feelings were real?”
Looking away from me, putting the scar I gave him on full display, he answered, “There were times when I thought you were using me to get out and times when things felt too real for that to be the case.”
“I was using you.”
His throat worked, swallowing painful emotions.
“But I was fighting my growing feelings for you, too.”
His head bobbed. “Well, that’s something, I guess.”
“But I’ll push being mad aside for now, if you do something for me.”
“I’ll do anything for you. Anything to make us work.”
“I want you to bring Rhylie to me. I know she’s the friend you see. I don’t know why you kept us apart, but I have guesses.”
“It’s not what you think.”
“You don’t know what I’m thinking.”
“You’re thinking worst-case scenarios.”
I shrugged. “I just want to see her.”
I’d hinted that I knew things a few times these last few days, but to get what I wanted, I knew I would have to make demands. Demands were harder to brush off.
“Cat, I—” And there he went, trying to brush me off again.
“No, Remi. You’re not getting out of this. I want to see my sister right now. I want to tell her I’m sorry and that I’ve missed her beyond words.”
“You can’t.” His head hung.
“Why not? Is she mad at me? Is that why you’ve never taken me to her?”
I feared that Rhylie hated me for begging to go to the show…for ruining her life. But there was another potential reason why Remi may have kept us apart. She could have blown his cover by helping me remember what I’d forgotten. That wouldn’t matter now that I knew everything. So, it could only be one thing.
“She is mad at me.”
“She was never mad at you.” His golden gaze met mine, and his hand wrapped around mine in my lap.
Dropping his stare for a moment, he looked like he expected me to pull away. Who knew why when I hadn’t all week. I’d let him brush his knuckles against my skin, hold my hand, and even kiss my head, and I enjoyed how it soothed him. With my memories returned, he must have thought I’d see him as another monster. Maybe Rothbart was right. Maybe I was brainwashed because I saw him as another survivor.
“She loved you, always. She just couldn’t face you seeing her the way she looked after her abuse.”
“Her eye—”
“Her eye, tongue, teeth. She was very badly hurt, Cat, and it affected her opinion of herself.”
Even when she was beautiful, Rhylie had suffered with her image, always seeing something the mirror didn’t show. Body dysmorphia was something I didn’t understand. I didn’t understand self-loathing at all until my time with Rothbart.
“Please, go get her,” my tone was begging, my head and everything else shaking. “Tell her I really need my big sister and that she’ll always be beautiful to me, with her special, kind heart and loving touch. Tell her I need one of her perfect hugs and an ear.”
“You can play with my ears.”
