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“What do you have to say for yourself?” I growled out.
“I’m yours,” he murmured. “You don’t have to worry. I am yours.”
Oh, fuck, that expression on his face, those tears dancing on his eyelashes. I felt like I could lift a fucking car. Instead, I kissed him hard, then turned him around so that he had his knees on my comfy office chair. I shoved his pants down.
“What are you doing?” he asked, and there was a waver in his voice, but his humor was slipping back where it belonged.
“Quiet,” I snapped.
“But—”
I pushed him forward so that he had to brace his arms on the back of the chair. “Oh, look at that muscled ass,” I said with a happy sigh. I slicked up my fingers and teased them into his hole. He moaned and jutted his ass back toward me, which was beyond fucking perfect, but in my mind’s eye I remembered him leaning closer to Merlin and laughing with him. Fury ripped through me again. No, he wasn’t doing anything wrong, but I still fucking hated it.
“Fuck, I don’t have a condom,” I murmured. Hell, I’d never considered doing anything like this at work.
“Do it,” Tav moaned out, shuddering under me. “I trust you. I haven’t.... I’ve tested recently. I’m negative. Just... please, Judah. I haven’t gone bare with anyone.”
Oh, wow. “Same. Fuck.” I lubed myself as fast as I could, then lined up. I didn’t give him time to get used to what was happening, just shoved home.
My knees almost gave out. After all the awfulness pumping around inside me, being so close to Tav was perfect. I wanted him on my cock. Wanted him near me. Wanted his smile. I’d never felt so crazy about him in the past, but he’d been gone for a long time. I bit his shoulder and pushed in as deeply as I could.
“Judah,” he whispered, my name sounding like a prayer.
“I would’ve never left you,” I growled into his ear, and he hung his head. I pulled out far enough to slam back in, then grabbed the armrests on the chair as it started to skid away from me. I fucked him hard and fast, dragging the chair back toward myself as I pushed him away on it, which added a strange movement to what we were doing. Soon we were both panting and moaning, and if anyone tried to find me, they would get a fuck of a lot more than they bargained for. I fucked him faster and harder, wanting to make sure he would remember this. Remember me.
That tiny hitch from Tav made me feel like a god among men as he tensed around me and rested his forehead on the back of the chair. I could tell he was unloading, and the knowledge sent me into a frenzy.
“Don’t come in me,” he muttered. “Might make for a sticky ride home.”
Blind fury ripped through me. After all that? After I got him off with my dick? After I saw him fucking laughing for someone else? He didn’t want me to fill him up. I gritted my teeth and tugged free of the most perfect hole on the fucking planet, then spun the chair to the side. I grabbed his hair and tugged him back until his head was leaning against my chest, and the chair sort of skidded away. He put a foot out, and our positions were precarious, but I jerked off fast and furious, covering his pecs with my cum. Then, I snorted as I started to go down, and I added a few sprinkles of piss.
“Did you just fuckin’ do that?” he asked. His expression danced between shocked and amused. “I didn’t want you to come in me to avoid a mess in my arse.”
“You think I would treat you like a dog? There. You’re fucking right.” I let him go, and he was forced to catch himself and awkwardly stand from the chair as I tucked myself away and zipped up. He stared at the mess and shook his head before he simply tugged his shirt down and covered it. Some of the liquid soaked through the fabric, but he didn’t seem to care. There was too much fatigue on his face.
All at once, he plopped down onto his ass on the floor, and I followed him, hand out to keep him from banging his head on the desk. I sat and dragged him closer, holding him. After a while I helped him rearrange his jeans, and we got him decent. If someone peeked in here now it would still look weird, but no one would be traumatized.
Sighing, I stared into his face. His eyes were closed and he was simply resting against me. “Did I...?”
“Hmm?” He opened his eyes and stared up at me, and the trust in his expression nearly ripped my heart out.
“Was I one of those shitty rich kids? I’ve met some spoiled assholes. I didn’t think I was... but I must’ve been.”
He snuggled closer and wrapped his arms around me, resting his head on my shoulder. I couldn’t help it. As pissed off as I happened to be, a hug from Tav was exactly what I wanted, and I gave him one right back.
“I’m sure you were sometimes,” he mumbled. “Mostly you were totally unaware. You would snack and invite me, and when you were done you would sometimes throw away half a plate of food. It always shocked me.” He shrugged.
His words ripped a hole in me that felt like it gushed out all my life force. I’d always suspected I’d been the problem. “You didn’t have enough food at home?”
“We were usually fine,” he said quietly, which wasn’t the same as saying they always had enough.
Fuck, was I really that blind? “So, it was things like that? I drove you off?” I whispered, slipping my fingertips over his bracelet.
“No,” he said, and the word was nearly a croak.
“Then what?”
He was quiet for a long time, and I couldn’t stand it, so I gave him a little shake.
