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Exhausted, emotional, and not thinking clearly, my brain kept circling around to how little I knew about the business side of Court of Mayhem.
I knew Judge wasn’t riding his bike on the straight and narrow. His version of right and wrong didn’t always line up with the law, and he didn’t hesitate to do what he felt needed to be done.
Like, toss someone into the back of a van.
Or kick someone in the kidney after they’d been kicked in the junk.
That tiny hint of doubt made a thin crack, and everything else rushed to work at it, splitting my insecurities and doubts wide open.
The way we met.
The way he’d pulled away after sex, becoming quiet and withdrawn.
The way he was upfront about so much but wouldn’t tell me why we were travelling across multiple states.
The way she’d hugged him.
Pissed off, I pulled on my boots—ones he must’ve thoughtfully removed, the bastard. I didn’t know if I wanted to do the stupidly irrational thing and flee into the night or do the stupidly crazy thing and run outside to confront him in the middle of a parking lot.
Before I could decide, the door behind me opened. I swung around to see Judge filling the doorway.
His eyes dropped to my feet and narrowed before shooting back up. Since he was Judge, and that meant he didn’t miss much, his body tightened at whatever he saw in my expression. “The fuck?”
“That’s what I’m wondering.”
He closed the door. “Why’re your boots on, O?”
“Why’re you hugging a random woman in a motel parking lot?”
He crossed his arms over his broad chest. “What do you think was happening?”
I had to give him credit, he didn’t go on the defensive and question why I was spying on him. I’d have likely beat him with the remote—at least in my head.
Or maybe in reality.
I wasn’t quite sure what I was capable of anymore.
“I think you were hugging a pretty woman,” I shot back.
Approaching slowly, like a graceful predator lulling its prey into a false sense of security, his voice was even.
Eerily calm.
“And the logical conclusion was I brought you across multiple states so I could hug a chick in the parking lot? Which, you woulda looked for longer than two seconds, you’d have seen she hugged me, and I transferred that hold to Scythe.” He paused for a moment and tilted his head, the angle and shadows making his strong, defined jaw look like it was chiseled from granite. “Or you thinking she’s here ‘cause I’m trafficking whores like that motherfucker?”
I opened my mouth to deny it, even though the thought had crossed my overwrought mind.
Before I could speak, he put his finger up. “Don’t. Don’t fuckin’ speak whatever lie is about to come outta that damn mouth.”
“Judge—”
“Fuck, O. Your attitude makes me hard and your jealous streak makes me harder, but this?” He rubbed the back of his neck, looking to the side as he shook his head. “This is fucked.”
There was a lot I could’ve said to diffuse the situation, but I was still riding the high of my emotions and the guilt of my accusations. “We met when you—”
“I know!” he shouted before inhaling deeply, fighting for control. “I fuckin’ know what I did. Don’t regret it—got you safe and in my life—but I put you through hell for a day. Said I was sorry. Showed it. Explained, sharing shit that could get me in serious trouble. And not just me, my brothers, too. But I trusted you and thought you understood. Thought we were past it.”
“We are,” I said honestly, regret clawing up my throat, as though it could clutch my stupid words and drag them back in.
