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Then how did he show up here with the big box? Maybe you don’t know which actor I mean. He was in The Honeymooner? He played that hot surfer who inherited a resort in the Caribbean?
Lucia
I know who he is. He’s on my list of celebrities I’m allowed to cheat with.
Me
First of all, seriously? You and Vinny made lists? What about the sanctity of marriage?
Lucia
Meh, trust me, after twelve years of having the same meal every night, you start to crave some new flavors.
Me
Okkkayyy … but back to Hudson. He really wasn’t there? You couldn’t have gone to the back for a break or something when he came in? Maybe Ma or Pops served him?
Lucia
I was here alone all morning. Pops had to drive Ma to the optometrist. I sold one big box, but it was to a woman with the straightest, blondest hair I’ve ever seen and a weird outfit. She was super pushy. What makes you think he was here?
Me
He said he was.
Lucia
Then Hudson Finch is a big, fat liar.
Me
Yup. Apparently. You should take him off your list.
Lucia
Nah, I’d still do him. Maybe you can introduce us.
Me
I hope you’re joking right now. Besides, who do you think the blonde is? I’m guessing she’s his awful girlfriend.
Lucia
Don’t ruin my fantasy. It’s literally all I have left.
Me
What about your husband and two beautiful children?
Lucia
Are you kidding? They’re the reason I need a rich fantasy life.
Well, that’s the final nail in the coffin. I now know all I need to know about Hudson Finch, phony baloney. I shall ignore him at will with a clear conscience.
As soon as I wake Frank up, I hear the TV crew coming down the hall. Act natural, Allie. Just act natural. And try to look smart. Wait. I am smart. Professional—try to look professional. I snatch a pencil out of my “Never Trust an Atom: They Make Up Everything” mug and tuck it behind my ear so I look like I’ve been hard at work this whole time.
“And here is our final stop—your office for the next six weeks,” Keenan says.
