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“Take care,” I say as I stand, she doesn’t reply just gives me a soft nod and I make my way out.
The cold air hits me the second I step outside and I go from tipsy to stumble in 0.02 seconds. Luckily, I don’t live far and the way back is down the busy entertainment street in the city so I feel safe. I pull out my phone and click on Arya.
Juliet – I miss you.
I don’t take a step before I get a reply.
Arya - I know. I will make it easier. I promise. I am sorry. I am so sorry, Juliet.
Juliet - I dontt know wh at that means!?
My eyes can barely focus and my drunk fingers miss swipe across the keyboard but I don’t give much thought to it as I press send.
Arya – I will make it better. I have to go. Be safe.
I try not to overthink and the tequila helps me with that. I can’t focus on a chain of thoughts for longer than a few seconds which gives my brain the time it needs to actually switch off from the Arya monologue. I stumble home and fall through the front door.
I don’t make it in bed, more of a sprawl over the bed. Which is where I remain for all of Sunday. I think I had 5 tequilas but my head screams that it must have been 55. I am way too old for shots. I dare not even look in the mirror. My ghostly look could not be improved with a tequila hangover, that much I am sure on.
I reread Arya’s message at least one hundred times. Each time reading more and more into it with no real answer other than I would have to wait and see.
14
My answer comes the following Wednesday. It is actually a quiet day in the cardio department and everyone is taking advantage by catching up with paperwork, reports, and emails when I receive a ping.
Subject Line: Reference Request
Dear Dr. Sansus
My name is Dr. Josh Cook, and I am acting head of the Cardiovascular Department in Stevenson City Hospital.
I don’t think we have ever crossed paths, although I did once attend a presentation you gave around the research on Coronary stents which has stuck with me for many years and I am of course an admirer of your work.
I am writing to you as we have received an application for a temporary position in the department and I was a little surprised to receive an application from Dr. Arya Harris. I know only recently she took the full-time permanent position with you and a doctor with her credentials would be most welcome but I wanted to confirm her references before we invited her to take the position.
Thank you for your time,
Kindest Regards
Dr. Josh Cook
I sit back in stunned silence. I guess this is her solution. She didn’t want me, didn’t want to be near me so she would go to Stevenson City Hospital on a temporary contract rather than stay here. In the city, she calls home, in the apartment which she has lovingly redone, in one of the best cardio departments in the world.
First, I am angry. I don’t deserve this. Surely, I don’t.
Then comes acceptance. It takes hours of staring at the same screen, of holding all my calls and letting the tears stream down my cheeks. She has made her choice to disappear and start again and she is only doing what was best for her. What I need to do though, it seems impossible: Move on. I don’t go to her. As the hospital falls quiet, I wait for the normal hustle and bustle to quieten down, and then I begin my reply.
Subject Line: Reference Request
Dear Dr. Cook
Thank you for your kind words in regards to my presentation on Coronary stents it is certainly an area of my work in which I have spent a lot of time working theoretically and practically to improve our current methods for higher long-term success rates.
I can confirm that Dr. Arya Harris is a highly well-regarded member of the current Cardiovascular Department here and I am Head of the department. Dr. Arya Harris was offered a permanent contract with us a few months ago. The terms of which can be requested by our Human Resources department if you require the exact dates.
Dr. Arya Harris has only been with us for a few months but in that time, I have come to work closely alongside her and I can assure you that your department would be very fortunate to have her join your team. I can say with complete candor and sincerity that she is one of the best surgeons I have had the pleasure of working with and the perfect colleague.
She is focused, attentive, and dedicated to her profession. She is a natural with the patients, a thoughtful colleague, and an inspiring surgeon. I understand that she is choosing to move on for personal reasons but the department and I will be very sad to see her go.
