AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Thank you for reaching out to me, if you require any further information, please do not hesitate to contact me.
Kindest Regards
Dr. Juliet Sansus
I press send before I can change my mind. I know it is the right thing to do. She deserves the position, she actually deserves better but it is her choice now on where to go. She has made the decision and I have to try and respect that.
I grab my keys and shut down my laptop. I don’t bother tidying away, I just flick the light and lock my office door behind me, and head out the back way of the hospital.
Even after all this time, it is like I hold a second sense when it comes to her. I know she is within my vicinity as though the air changes around her and my body can feel it. I look around allowing my eyes to find her. I slow my step to let her pass but she doesn’t, she comes beside me, falling in line with my step.
“I just got off the phone with Dr. Cook,” she says softly.
“Oh … that was fast. I only just replied,” I reply, looking straight ahead, avoiding making any eye contact with her.
“Yes. He did mention that. Said you had just responded and HR pending the position was mine if I wanted it. I don’t know what you said, but he used the words glowing and best reference he had ever received.” She pauses and I don’t fill the gap. “So, I wanted to say thank you. I mean, you didn’t need to, you could have just referred him to HR. I would have understood.”
I clear my throat, trying to shift the ball of emotion which now seems to be choking me. “I was angry. I was hurt that you didn’t tell me personally and I had to find out that way. But I would never ever do something to jeopardize your career like that Arya. If you don’t want to be around me anymore, I don’t have to like it or even be okay with it but I’m mature enough to let you go.”
“Oh, Juliet! Don’t say that. It isn’t that I don’t want to be around you anymore, but how can I? Look at how much I have hurt you. How much pain I have caused? I see it in your eyes, and I did that to you. I hate myself for it, and I miss you. Fuck, I miss you so much. But I am not allowed to miss you because I am the one who fucked up. I am the one who hurt you. So, I am just trying to make it better for you. Better for me. For both of us so we don’t have to keep seeing each other and keep feeling like this anymore.” I can see the anguish in her expression, I can feel the pain in her words but I still don’t understand.
“But Arya, if you feel like that and I feel like this, then why? Why can’t we try again? I know that you are scared.” I turn and face her, looking her straight in the eye as my hands clasp hers. “I know you are afraid but you can rely on me. Haven’t I shown you? Can’t you see that I won't leave? That I won’t hurt you? I love you! I would never do anything at all to make you feel unsafe, unloved or unwanted. I want to spend the rest of my life doing the opposite!”
I don’t penetrate her walls; I see it in her eyes before she speaks a word.
“No Juliet. I can’t do it to you again. I know what will happen, we will go back to exactly how we were. Both falling, both on this path, and sooner or later, I won’t be able to give you want you need, what you want, what you deserve. And we will be right back here, except worse than this time because I will have hurt you again, knowing full well I would. My mind is made up. I am going to take the job at Stevenson City Hospital, already told them I would. I have to give 12 weeks’ notice here unless you replace me before. You will have my resignation on your desk in the morning.”
She pulls her fingers from my light hold, turns on her heel, and walks in the other direction and I walk home in deafening silence and I feel the tears on my cheeks.
15
Arya is as good as her word and I receive her perfectly handwritten letter of resignation. It is short.
Dear Dr. Juliet Sansus,
Please accept this letter as notice that I am resigning from my position here as a Cardiovascular surgeon. My final day of work will be 12 weeks as of the acceptance of this letter of resignation as per the terms of my contract.
Thank you for the support and the opportunities you have provided me with, it has been an honor to work with you and learn from you. You and your team have created a department that makes it a pleasure to come to work each morning, and I will miss you all.
If I can do anything to help with your transition in finding and training my replacement, please let me know.
Sincerely,
Arya.
Dr. Arya Harris.
Twelve weeks took us to Christmas. Jim was in shock when I told him she was leaving.
“But just a few weeks ago she was telling me how happy she was here! That she couldn’t believe how fortunate she was to work in the department and alongside you! What happened?” He asked in surprise.
“I don’t know Jim. She just said personal reasons and I didn’t want to push. All I know is that she is going and I need to find a replacement as soon as possible.”
He looks me over and thinks about pushing the matter himself but then thinks better of it. “Okay, Juliet. I will reissue the job advert. I am sorry it didn’t work out with Dr. Harris, I know you thought very highly of her.”
His words hit me. It is the first time anyone has offered sympathy for the pain I am going through in losing Arya. Not their fault, it is after all a secret, but even so. It was a comfort.
“Thank you, Jim.”
