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“It’s okay.” She forced one of her fake giggles that made me want to ball up and die. “You can always touch me. It’s us. I’m just feeling a little twitchy lately. It’s probably stress.”
No. I wouldn’t accept that. It was not just stress and it would not get any better if she didn’t address it. “Kai, please just tell me what’s going on.”
“What do you mean?” Her voice wasn’t quite as cool as it usually was. She understood me perfectly.
“You jumped when your phone rang.”
The sound of her nails scratching nervously beneath her hair sounded in the darkness. “I don’t like to hear my phone. I don’t even like to look at the screen in case a notification pops up.”
“Why?”
“In case Javi’s upset. I don’t like to fight.”
“But...you broke up.”
“That doesn’t mean he magically goes away, Jo.”
“Then block him.”
“He’s blocked everywhere except for texting and calling. If he’s going to show up out of the blue, I at least want to know about it. If I cut that line of communication, he’ll come unannounced.”
So she had to comply with him just to keep him from harassing her more than he already was. This was ridiculous. The man needed to be locked up. Kai needed to come home. I needed to get a fucking grip because an overwhelming stinging feeling began burning behind my nose.
“Are you safe?” I asked quietly.
“Of course, I’m safe. I’m here with you.”
Her answer sent me right over the edge. If I kept speaking, I would’ve yelled. She tucked herself under my chin, placing her forehead on my chest. I obliged her silently, angrily, nudging closer, hoping she’d just stay safe with me forever and be done with it so I could finally fucking relax.
Chapter 11
Jonah
Over the last couple of days, I’d watched Kai’s smile fade immediately any time we turned away, I noticed her quick twitches when something scared or surprised her, and I listened to the way she brushed off certain topics as if they were no big deal. I was almost offended that she believed I’d fall for it, but perhaps she wasn’t doing it for me at all. Perhaps she was protecting herself.
I suddenly found it very easy to ignore Caroline’s incessant texting now that Kai was here, and I even took my own advice and blocked her. It was a mystery why I hadn’t done it sooner, but I finally told her to fuck off once and for all. Phones and texting and all that other bullshit weren’t real to me, anyway. They simply weren’t, so blocking her was simple. My breakup was real, the reason was real, and Kai was real.
I focused my energy on pulling my head out of my ass and finding a way to cheer Kai up, thus I found myself standing over her like a creep in the night at 2:00 a.m. I didn’t bother waking her. Instead, I signaled to June to grab the sweatshirt and sweatpants tossed over my desk chair and bent myself down to Kai. The half-open door to the hallway let in just enough light to see her curled up, wrapped tightly in a heavy blanket as if it were the dead of winter somewhere up north.
Beautiful girl.
I whispered little greetings to her as I lifted her from bed to keep her from flinching awake. A bit to my surprise, she remained calm. She only stirred when I finally wrapped her around myself like a backpack strapped to my front.
“Jojo.” She nuzzled her sleepy face into my collarbone, and I snagged a deep inhale as her nose against my neck sent a tickle down my body. With Kai in my arms, I followed June out of the apartment and down to the street where Oli was waiting in the car.
The streetlamps offered us dim, dirty light in the mild night air. June got in the passenger side next to Oli, and I laid Kai on her side in the back, sitting next to her head. Her top leg flopped off the seat, her body turning itself face down and sliding closer and closer to the edge as Oli kicked the car into gear. She groaned loudly, upset about being disturbed from her slumber.
“Why are you kidnapping me?” she mumbled into the leather as she continued to slip.
“I didn’t want to bother you by waking you up,” I said. Her body finally slid fully off the seat, and she landed on the floor with a thud. Her pout was visible in passing street lights.
“Yet here we are,” she grumbled.
“We’re going for late-night pancakes,” Oli said.
“Oh!” Kai’s consciousness returned fully, her attention switching to the exciting activity at hand. “I love la—ow!” A sharp turn made her smack her head against the back of June’s seat, right over my feet. I reached down and tugged her back up, stifling my laughs. She adjusted herself next to me as a sweatshirt and sweatpants came flying back over June’s head.
“Oh, thank god,” Kai said. She grabbed the clothes and used them to cover her thin sleepwear. “Is everyone else in pajamas? I don’t want to be the only one in pajamas.”
