“Well, I care.” Daire pouted like only the brattiest brat could. Making my dick stir. Though I honestly didn’t think he did it on purpose. “I like being the one who gets along with everybody. Like I don’t even have to try, you know? It’s my gift.” He scowled. “Well, it was.”
I knew where this was going but I played dumb. “Who the fuck doesn’t like you?”
“Sekh.”
I shrugged. “Fucking ignore him. He’s too fucking busy playing wargames with the Templar knight to care about what you do anyway.” Though the corner of my lips did curl up at how the sphinx had handled the fucking dragon. I’d pay good money to see that shit again, even if Shara didn’t do the fucking transference bullshit again and blast us all.
“I can’t just ignore him. It’s too important.”
“That he like you? Fuck him. Nobody gives a shit as long as you do your job.”
His shoulders drooped miserably. “But that’s just it. I don’t know if I have a job anymore.”
“What, because of the fucking sphinx? Fuck that shit. He’s too big and bad to play cuddle buddies with Shara. She’ll always need you.” So will I.
“You don’t understand.”
“Then help me fucking understand.”
“What’s the most horrible mistake you’ve ever made?”
My jaw flexed, my face darkening with shame. “Falling for you.”
He made a choked, shocked sound of pain, his mouth sagging open. His eyes shimmering with tears.
“Fuck me sideways. I didn’t say it right. I meant when we were young. I started to obsess about you. I couldn’t fucking sleep if I couldn’t see you. Smell you. So I started sleeping under your window, until your mother found out.”
His eyes widened. “That was you? You were smashing Mom’s roses all that time? She was so pissed.”
I let out a harsh, barking laugh. “I know. She got the queen involved, and bam. I found myself sent to fucking Skye.”
“Now think about Mister All Seeing High and Mighty calling you out on that mistake. Smirking about it. Rubbing your nose in it. What do you do now?”
“I tell him to fuck off. Who gives a shit? He’s nothing to me. As long as our queen isn’t pissed at me, I don’t give a shit about anything.”
He let out another miserable sigh. “But that’s just it. She might be… disappointed. In me.”
I let out a deep belly chuckle. I couldn’t help it. “No fucking way.”
“I could let her down,” he insisted.
“How?”
“If I have to choose between her and Rik.” His shoulders slumped and he leaned forward, burying his face in his hands. “Sekh’s right. I’d choose Rik every fucking time. I’m a shitty excuse for a Blood.”
I patted him awkwardly on the back. “Look, you’re worried about fucking nothing. She isn’t that kind of queen and you know it.”
“But—”
“She’s not,” I repeated, louder. “She’s done some fucked up shit, sure. The cobra queen scares the bejesus out of me too. That thing with the trees, she and Itztli sacrificing each other. Fucking messed up. Hanging up that poor bastard to drain all the fucking taint out of him. Fucking awful. But she did it because that’s how fucking powerful she is, and they sure as fuck aren’t complaining. She isn’t ever going to point a finger at you and say get the fuck out because you love Rik too much.”
“You don’t know that.”
I rolled my eyes. “By goddess, I know it for a fucking fact. She doesn’t fuck around when it comes to love.”
Agonized, he turned those kitty cat eyes on me. “How? How do you know? For sure?”
“Because she didn’t kick me out for loving you. In fact, me loving you was the reason she decided to give me a fucking chance in the first place.”