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For the second time today, my heart is bruised.
Chapter 20
All Good Things Must Come to an End
Mae
Walking into my home, I take a deep, cleansing breath. It smells incredible in the kitchen and my stomach grumbles, asking what delicacies Remi made for dinner. I hardly ate lunch, and I’m ravenous.
The house is silent as I creep into the family room, spotting one sexy manny slouched on the sofa, sleeping peacefully. His arms are crossed over his broad chest, and his lips form a soft pout as he softly snores. I wonder if it’s creepy that I want to take a picture so I can look back on this moment when he’s no longer in our lives.
All good things come to an end. If today’s shit storm isn’t a prime example of that, I don’t know what is. My heart lodges in my throat, and the dull ache in my hollow chest turns to painful anguish.
Pulling the plush faux fur throw blanket from the armchair, I cover him up, brushing his hair back and kissing his forehead as he snuggles down in the warmth. Grabbing a bottle of Cab, I tiptoe back into the kitchen to find dinner. When I open the fridge, I’m surprised to see it full.
There is a covered plate resting on the shelf, with a note on it: For my queen.
I thrill and bristle at the words. While I’m certainly his, I cannot claim him. It isn’t right. We have no future together. Even though it hurts, it’s the truth, and I have to be the one to define our boundaries. Remi is a great guy with a huge heart. It’s what helps him make decisions. It’s also what will get him hurt.
“Hey.”
I startle, standing straight at the rasp of his sleepy voice, hoping he can’t read my thoughts on my face. “Hi, I see you’ve made a feast.” I smile, lifting my plate. “Looks amazing.”
Remi’s cheeks ruddy, and something pulses in my core. “Yeah, tried something new. It came out okay.” He scratches the back of his head. “You want me to heat it up?”
“I can do it.” I smile, showing him how much I appreciate coming home to this. To him.
“Okay, I guess I’ll head out then.”
Disappointment stabs me in the gut, aggravating the festering wound there. From our conversation earlier, I thought he’d want to stay again. The thought of having him all night is what kept me from drowning in misery today.
“You could stay,” I whisper, hating the plea in my voice. I want him to stay because he wants to, not because it will make me happy.
“I don’t think I should,” he says on a thick swallow.
Disappointment turns to sadness, making my stomach cramp. He got what he wanted, didn’t he? So did I, I guess.
I keep my voice light so he can’t tell how much I’m hurting inside. “Sure. Yeah. Sounds good.”
There’s something somber in his eyes, and my shoulders drop. It’s something else I need to fix. Shutting the fridge, I place my plate of deliciousness on the counter.
“You okay, Remi?” Eager feet shuffle closer to him, and I brush my thumb across his lip.
It quivers while his stare heats. He nods.
“Do you need some time off?” I hope he says no, even though he deserves it.
I can’t believe I’ve become so dependent on someone else. It’s not just about Isabel’s care. It’s about the comfort I feel when he’s here. The way my house feels like a home because of him. It’s about our blossoming friendship, aside from our sexual attraction.
He’s become as important to me as Jay. He doesn’t realize his mere presence—especially now—is significant to me.
Without thinking, I wrap my arms around him. It’s not the kiss of passion I was hoping for, but it’s something. If he’s leaving for the night, I just want to savor his warmth a little.
Kissing the top of my head, he extricates himself from my embrace. “Goodnight, Mae.”
I stand frozen in place as ice-cold blood runs through my veins at the brush-off. “Night.” It’s short, but what else is there to say?
Dejected, I turn so he can’t see the emotion on my face. It’s been a dumpster-fire of a day, and I’m too tired to put up pretenses. When I hear the soft click of the door behind me, I throw my plate of dinner into the sink. It shatters, and creamy sauce splashes everywhere. I’m shocked at my outburst, but when my nose burns, forewarning tears, I pull a glass out of the cupboard and throw it against the wall. With the satisfying smash echoing in my ear, I go for another plate. And another.
