AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“That’s not an answer, Nasir.”
“Fine. I want you to feel comfortable in my home. With my friends. With me. I want you to think of my home as one of your main bases in Europe.”
Her heart thrashed itself in its cage. “Why?”
“Because I want you to be happy.” An exasperated breath rattled out of him.
Yana knew he could be infuriatingly stubborn—a dog with a bone, really, when he got stuck on something—it was one of the qualities they shared, but she’d never expected to be at the receiving end of that resolve.
It scared her that she’d caught his passing fancy, or his sense of fairness. And where it would leave her when he’d had enough. “When you visit us, at least,” he added as an afterthought.
She was shaking her head, excitement and something headier washing away the dread and fear and insecurities and the little rationality she possessed. “Don’t do this. Don’t trap me. Don’t—”
And then he was reaching for her, and his hands clutched her arms and there was such sheer urgency, such reckless, naked desire in his eyes, that she was the one rendered a statue now. “You’re the most confounding woman I’ve ever met. How is it trapping you if I want to do the right thing by you?”
“Because it’s all pity and for God’s sake, Nasir, I don’t want your pity,” she said, sidestepping the minefield she’d created herself.
How did she explain to him that her stupid heart had never been able to distinguish pity from liking when it came to him? That she’d take the little interest he showed her, turn it into hope and hang herself with it?
“It’s not pity if I want the best for you or if I want to share your burden or if I want to tell you that I’ll be here for you when you come out of rehab for your gambling addiction. I want to be the friend I should’ve been to you years ago.”
Yana saw the trap then and it was of her own making.
Lies and half-truths and misunderstandings...she’d built them so tall and high that he didn’t even see the real her. He saw the illusion she’d created, felt sorry for the mess she’d showed him, because he’d decided with that arrogant self-righteousness that he’d had a hand in it, too.
The illusion not only didn’t serve her anymore but also threatened to make her worst nightmare come true. “I lied to you, Nasir. Those were not my debts. I’m not addicted to gambling and I never was.”
He blinked and she braced herself for his disbelief and doubts. But he recovered fast with, “Then whose debts were they?”
“Isn’t my word enough?”
“Of course it’s enough. But now that we’re dispensing with the smoke and mirrors, I want the whole truth. How were you in such a financial hole, then?”
“It was Diana.” The words were wrenched out of her from some deep cavern, and yet immediately freed her of their dark weight. Until this moment when she’d made it real, she hadn’t realized how much the secret had gouged her soul. How the pain it brought had stayed inside her, pulsing and throbbing, hollowing her out.
He sighed. “Diana took advantage of you, again.”
“Yes. She...cleared out my bank accounts last year. I took measures then. But she still managed to get hold of my credit cards, and she...maxed them out. All our assets are jointly owned since I started modeling before I was legally an adult. I’d thought I could trust her, but she forged my signature and sold the apartment in New York and the house in California. Even the few rare pieces of jewelry I owned...she completely cleaned me out.”
“While you were busy looking after Jacqueline,” Nasir said, finally connecting the dots. Seeing a picture emerge in which he’d been so eager to find fault with her when there was none.
“I don’t regret it one bit,” Yana said, memories softening her mouth. “I know she wasn’t perfect, but Jacqueline showed me more love and acceptance and concern than Diana ever did.”
“Your loyalty is laudable,habibi. Is that why you covered up her affairs?” He wasn’t angry but his bitterness was clear. “You had a just reason to hate me anyway.”
“That’s unfair. I didn’t let our past color my actions, Nasir. Even when you treated me as if...” She tugged at the neckline of her dress in a nervous gesture he was beginning to recognize. “Jacqueline was desperate to save your relationship.”
“And yet, she kept cheating on me.”
“You’ve no idea what it is to be in love, do you? And to be found wanting?” she said, vibrating with emotion.
“Love was never supposed to be a part of our relationship. She knew that.”
“Don’t tell me the great observer of humanity’s foibles and flaws thinks relationships can work based on a chart and a few conditions?” Even now, sympathy and affection filled her words. “Jacqueline made mistakes. It doesn’t mean she ever stopped loving you. She begged me to help her, to...”
“You must have known it was a sinking ship, Yana. She abandoned Zara to you to care for.”
“By that time, she was drinking a lot, her modeling dropped off and her business took a dive and...then came her diagnosis. She became bitter, different from the warm woman I’d come to adore.”
