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“I don’t know what a shebang bang is, and I don’t care. He’s not having me again.”
“Uh-huh,” she says, “I’ll believe it when I see it.”
“Well, hopefully you never see it because that would be disgusting.” I laugh.
“Ella, sometimes I do think you are one of the silliest, goofiest people I know.”
“Yeah. And?”
“And I just love you for it,” she says.
“You go ahead and swipe and tell me about it later. Okay.”
“Okay,” I say.
“Also, Isabel.”
“Yes?”
“Thank you for listening to me and putting up with me. I know I’ve been going on about him a lot recently. I’m just so infuriated.”
“It’s okay,” she says. “Trust me. We all get crazy when it comes to hot guys.”
“Uh-huh,” I say and hang up. I lean back on the couch and stare at my phone. I’ve downloaded three different dating apps and am ready to start swiping. I do wonder what Colton was calling about. I do wonder if he’d wanted to meet up. I’m glad that I hung up the phone though, because I know me. I know that even though he gets on my last nerve and I can’t stand him, I’m still super attracted to him and I still want him.
There’s just something about the way that he talks and the way that he commands himself that I can’t resist. If I’m honest, I’ve always found him to be a little bit handsome. Okay. Really, really handsome.
I know that I’m one of the biggest fools alive by having a crush on my brother’s best friend, especially when I can’t stand him. But I can’t help myself. And if I’m honest, I’m also enjoying the job. It’s something that I’ve never even thought about doing, but it’s something that I’m really good at.
I look down at the iPad, open the Procreate app and stare at the different designs I’ve come up with for logos for the different communities. I’m impressed with them, even though I designed them. I’ve always been slightly artistic, but I’d never created a logo before.
I need to email them to Colton tomorrow, but I’m nervous about what his feedback is going to be. For some reason, I don’t want him to hate them. I don’t want him to tell me that I’ve wasted his time and his money. I don’t want him to say that he thinks that it’s not working out and that I should find another job. Because I’ve tried really hard and I’m proud of what I’ve done. And well, it’s been a long time since I’ve been able to say that.
I sigh as I open one of the dating apps and start swiping. “Everything will be fine,” I mutter to myself. I just need to find a hottie, and that way, Colton won’t think that I care about being with him anymore. Even though he is the starring man of my fantasy every night.
I think a part of the reason why I am trying to forget him is because it seems that he isn’t interested in me whatsoever. He hasn’t even spoken to me since we hooked up in the bathroom. Not a word, and that makes me feel kind of used and I hate that feeling. I really, really hate that feeling. I am not going to allow this man to get into my head. I am not going to allow him to make me feel bad about myself. I am not going to allow him to make me question who I am and what we have because I want him to want me. I want him to want me as more than just a fuck buddy. I want him to want to take me on a date. I want him to be jealous. Like I was jealous when I saw him in the bar. Like I was jealous just thinking about what he was doing. “Stop it. Ella.” I mumble to myself. “Just stop it. I have to get out of this mindset. I don’t want to think about him anymore.”
19
There is a bagel and coffee on my desk when I get to work the next morning and I look around in surprise. This is the first time anyone’s ever left me anything, and I’m not sure why it’s here. I open the bag to look at the bagel, debating taking a bite, when I hear a knock on the door. I look up and there is Colton, his blue eyes shining as he stares at me.
“Morning, Ella,” he says, giving me a wide smile. “How are you today?”
“I’m fine,” I say suspiciously as he walks inside and closes the door. “I’m not looking for a morning quickie though, just in case you were thinking that was on the table.”
He bursts out laughing and shakes his head. “Do you think that all I want from you is sex?”
“I don’t know.” I shrug. “It seems to me that every single time that you’re around me, you are either hinting about having sex with me or someone else, of course or ...”
“Or what?” he says. Rolling his eyes. “I am a CEO, there’s more on my mind than fucking you, Ella Wynter.”
“I’m glad to hear that because I’m sure my brother would not like to know that you have fucked me several times in some really crass places.”
“Shall we call him now and ask what he thinks?” he says, pulling out his phone.
I stare at him for a couple of seconds. “You’re not going to call him,” I say. I watch as he presses a button and puts it on speakerphone. My jaw drops as it rings once and then Sam answers the phone.
“Hey, what’s up, Colton? What are you doing?”
