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Kate was right. The grainy black-and-white photo removed some of Sophie’s hate. The outline of Kate’s baby, the tiny hands clenched into little fists, one thumb in its mouth, thawed Sophie’s initial wave of frustration. It didn’t change the fact that Kate was sending Sophie to rehearsal without her sidekick, though. The possibility that Liam had heard their entire conversation on Friday in the coffee shop was racing round Sophie’s mind and churning in her stomach.
To avoid festering in the flat alone as she waited for rehearsal to begin, Sophie went to the pub, ordered her usual chicken burger and Diet Coke, and sat reading until it was exactly half past seven. There was no way she was going to arrive at rehearsal until she absolutely had to. She was mortified that tonight’s rehearsal meant dealing with the fact she’d not got the solo and the possibility that Liam had overheard their conversation the other day at the coffee shop. Even the thought of it being a possibility made Sophie feel physically sick with nerves. Her stomach flipped as she shuffled out of the booth and got ready to leave the pub.
Walking across the village green in the frosty November air, Sophie was met with the drifting sound of the choir warming up. If she went in now, she could slip into a chair at the back and go unnoticed. A shiver accompanied her cringe. She took a deep breath and pushed the door open. It creaked loudly as it closed behind her at the exact same moment that everyone was sitting down, and a sea of faces glanced in her direction. Including Liam’s.
‘Hi, Soph,’ he said, standing poised to start at the front of the hall.
Sophie raised a hand sheepishly and gave a little wave before finding a spare chair at the back of the hall to sit on. Her coat stayed firmly zipped up in a subconscious attempt to keep herself hidden from view.
‘I hope you don’t mind us starting. It’s just, you weren’t here. Did you need to do any announcements or anything?’
Sophie shook her head. She didn’t know what was worse: Liam taking charge of her rehearsal or everyone looking in her direction while he questioned her. She felt like all the things that could embarrass her were tattooed onto her face.
‘OK. Let’s start with “Gaudette” again today then.’ Liam lifted his baton and the choir turned back to him. Sophie let out a breath she’d been holding, and everyone started to sing.
Sophie found her voice to be croaky, having not warmed up. Not only that, but her whole body was tense and uneasy. That horrible feeling was lying in the pit of her stomach again. She felt like the embarrassment was eating her alive.
To make matters worse, Liam looked good tonight. He wore a Christmas jumper, which some may have deemed cheesy, but for Sophie only made him more attractive. He hadn’t shaved for a few days, she noticed, and he was developing a darker shadow of stubble on his chin.
Across the room, his hazel eyes met hers frequently. He was looking at everyone, of course. But she became acutely aware each time they made eye contact and it made her shiver.
Oh God. Kate was right. She did fancy him a bit – as if she needed anything else to add to the discomfort of the situation. She couldn’t focus when he was around, she’d become obsessed with his eyes and he featured in far too many of her conversations, even when he wasn’t around. Sophie realised she was in trouble.
He occupied her thoughts until it was break time, the singing part of the evening passing by in a blur.
‘Congratulations, Lulu,’ Sophie said, reaching past her for a polystyrene cup of tea during the break.
‘Thank you, honey,’ Lulu said, enveloping her in a huge cuddle, tea spilling everywhere.
This week, Lulu’s coat of choice was a bright yellow mackintosh that crinkled up and poked Sophie in the face as they hugged – but at least it wasn’t a carcass and it was waterproof enough that the spilt tea ran right off it.
‘You were fabulous too,’ she said, releasing her.
‘Well,’ Sophie said, sipping her tea to hide her flushed cheeks. ‘Not as fabulous as you.’
She realised just how disappointed she was, having missed out on something she’d not even wanted in the first place.
Greg smiled sympathetically at Sophie through the serving hatch, as Lulu’s attention went to someone else congratulating her for the solo. ‘You were wonderful, love,’ he added quietly.
‘Thanks, Greg,’ Sophie said, deciding that today was definitely a day for adding an extra sugar to her tea. She plopped one in from the plate on the side.
She wasn’t really in the mood to talk to anyone, but Liam seemed to be doing the rounds and speaking to everyone as he sidled over for a hot drink of his own. Sophie ducked out of the hall and found her way to the toilet, locking the door and sitting down for no other reason than to escape the furore. Only when the noise had died down did she creep back into the main hall and take up her place at the back. She could do this; only a little while longer and she could escape.
‘We’re just going to go through the notes for the harmonies in “O Holy Night”,’ Liam said. ‘And then, Lulu, would you be happy to stay and learn the solo music? We can put the two bits together at next week’s rehearsal.’
‘Wonderful,’ Lulu said, looking around to soak up the adoring smiles she undoubtedly expected every time anyone mentioned the fact she was the soloist.
Every concert was the same. Sophie didn’t begrudge Lulu her success. She’d worked hard for it over the course of her lifetime and she’d be sure to bring in a huge audience, all making donations to the charity. Plus, it was a minor triumph that Sophie would be able to escape rehearsal sooner rather than later.
‘Soph?’ Liam’s address startled her. ‘Would you mind coming round the front and joining the altos again? With Lulu singing solo, we could really do with a voice like yours to strengthen that middle section.’
She smiled at his half compliment and shuffled through the row of seats, avoiding the gaze of everyone as they turned to watch.
‘Perfect.’ Liam smiled at her and she averted her eyes. ‘So, seeing as you’ve just made all that effort, let’s begin with the alto line and we can build it from there.’
Sophie nodded. Her new seat was right next to where Liam was conducting from. She was so close she thought she could almost smell his aftershave, all pine cones and spice. His proximity meant that for the rest of the rehearsal, Sophie’s head became a jumble of emotion. One minute she was feeling the flush of embarrassment and the next the heat of something else, something new. At no point did she manage to focus her attention on learning the alto line.
Just as she was thinking about how good he looked in his jumper, she dropped her music on the floor. It glided across the surface and landed at Liam’s feet. She leant forward to pick it up as he reached down to retrieve it for her, and their hands brushed.
