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He didn't know what had happened, but it was triggering all sorts of shit in him that he didn't want to be reliving.
By the time Phoebe and Annie headed off to his bedroom to get Annie to bed, he felt like he was going to snap. He was so tense that his muscles hurt, and he was on such edge that every fast movement or unexpected sound triggered his startle reflex.
"Good night, Jacob!" Annie ran over to him and leapt into his arms.
He grinned and swept up the little girl in a hug. "Good night, pumpkin."
She beamed at him. "You'll be here in the morning when I get up?"
"I'll be here."
"And then Bella and Lucas will come over, and we'll ride again?"
He looked over at his siblings, and they both nodded. "Yep."
"Tomorrow I'm going to name the new pony. I'll know then what to call her. Can I pet her tomorrow?"
Jacob had let Annie only peek at the new pony today, because the animal was still settling and nervous. "Maybe tomorrow. We'll see how she feels."
"Okay!" She beamed at him, and then wiggled to get down. He released her, and something inside him turned over as she sprinted down the hall, raced into his room, and catapulted herself onto the bed. Cupcake ran after her and did the same, and then Phoebe followed and shut the door, pausing to look at him before she closed it.
"Fuck." He clasped his hands on his head and turned away, looking at his siblings. "What the hell?"
Bella and Lucas looked at each other, then Bella patted the kitchen counter. "Come in the kitchen," she said quietly. "So they won't hear us."
He swore under his breath again and walked into the kitchen. He leaned against the stove and folded his arms over his chest while his siblings joined him.
"First question," Bella asked. "What were you thinking when Annie and Cupcake ran into your room just now? You had a weird expression on your face."
He closed his eyes. "That the room was meant for them. That I fucking loved seeing them in there."
"You weren't annoyed?" Her voice was softer now.
"No." He opened his eyes to look at his siblings. "What the fuck, you guys? Why don't I want to go on a ride and get out of here?"
"What do you want to do?" Lucas asked.
"I want to stay here. I want to sit outside the door and make sure they're safe."
Bella pressed her lips together. "What do you really want?"
He didn't need to think about it before he answered. "I want to be in that room with them. I want to be reading to that little girl. And then I want more time with Phoebe."
His siblings exchanged looks, and he didn't miss the worry on their faces. "What?"
Bella turned to him. "I know you don't always get people, but Phoebe was giving you super bad vibes tonight—"
"I know that. I'm not an idiot." He clasped his hands over his head. "It was great. We had a great time in the barn. I've never experienced that before. And then she got up to shower, and she was still laughing and teasing, and then, suddenly, there was a chasm between us."
Bella burst out with laughter. "Oh, God, you had me totally freaked out. It's fine."
"What's fine? It's not fine."
"She freaked out because she's falling for you," Bella said. "She's not ready, and she's scared, but she's realizing how amazing you are. She's trying to put distance between you so she doesn’t have to admit to herself how she's feeling."
Hope settled in Jacob's chest, a painful, unfamiliar emotion. "You think?"
Lucas grimaced. "Maybe she just doesn't want more, and you came on a little strong."
