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The words replay in my mind and God does it make for a beautiful song.
“I didn’t want to keep it from you, but I also didn’t want to tell you until I knew whether or not she’d come. Now, this doesn’t change anything, Ryan. We still have to be very careful how we play this. If not for your sake, for hers. Max made it clear if there is another scandal she will not make it out unscathed.”
“Okay.”
I should say more, but now all I can think about is seeing her again.
I turn and run back to the stage, a huge shit-eating grin on my face.
Gareth’s brows furrow when he sees my sudden change in demeanor, and my smile only grows.
“Boys, we have work to do.”
???
“Damn, Knox. I didn’t realize.” Ant pulls his hair up into a bun on top of his head using his lucky scrunchie. “Why didn’t you tell us that shit was serious? I feel like a dirtbag for ragging on you.”
I’d never admitted that my feelings for Juliet went far deeper than just sex. It was something that I’d only been slowly admitting to myself. It was like the longer I went without her, the more I realized what she meant to me.
“So it doesn’t suck, right?” I ask them, the paper full of chicken scratch and ink stains clutched in my fingers.
“It’s good, man. Really,” Gareth responds with a shrug. “And I agree. I just wish you would have told us. We could have helped with some grand gesture shit to fix this mess.”
Neil lights a joint and takes a long drag. “This is about as grand a gesture as it gets. Just be sure before you do this that it’s what you want. I don’t want you pulling this and then tucking tail in a few months when shit gets real. She’s a nice girl, it wouldn’t be right.”
I can’t help but smile at his protectiveness. I like that they like her. These three guys will always be a huge part of my life and having them love who I love is important.
Love who I love.
“I’ve had two months to tuck tail. If I didn’t want this I wouldn’t be here dicking around with you. I don’t know how to explain it. She just… fits. I want her and I don’t care what anyone has to say about it. I just hope it’s enough.”
I look at the paper again.
It has to be enough.
“Chicks dig shit like this,” Gareth says before finding his place on the stage.
“This isn’t some chick. This is Juliet. It has to be perfect.”
We run through the set a few more times, putting extra focus on the new addition. It’s shaky at first, but by the third go, it sounds pretty damn good.
I’m not used to feeling nervous before a show, but this one has me breaking a sweat. I’m used to being the center of attention, but to put my feelings on display for the world to see? That’s new territory.
It’s also a massive risk.
By doing this I also put the spotlight back on her.
A part of me thinks that it may not be fair to make this decision for her, to tell everyone where I stand completely blind to how she feels in return. But the other part of me is screaming for that one to shut the fuck up.
If I don’t take this opportunity tonight, I may never get the chance again. Damn the rules, damn the consequences.
Chapter Fifty
Juliet
It feels strange being on this side of the stage now. The pit is slammed full of fans, and I’ve been elbowed twice. Everyone is pushing and shoving, trying to get as close as possible to the stage, but I am happy to stay back. We’re in the middle and off to one side, perfectly blending in with the masses.
I wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t see me at all.
