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“Desperate attempt to change the subject, noted.” She guided him to the kitchen island and pulled out a stool for him. Then she grabbed a red plastic bowl and filled it with his favorite salt-and-vinegar chips. “Eat. You look shell-shocked. Your blood sugar is probably low.”
“I’m fine.” He shoved aside the bowl of chips. The last thing he wanted was something crunchy in his mouth. It would taste like ground glass.
“Is this about the hunkalicious ex-boyfriend who barged back into Kendra’s life today?”
He swiveled to look at her. “You met him?”
“No, but people are talking. I went to Alvin’s Burgers to interview for a part-time after-school job and all the servers were buzzing. Alvin had to scold them to stop gossiping.”
“You want to work at Alvin’s? What about the job at the counseling center you applied to?”
“They said I need a high school degree, but to try again next year after I graduate. But they also said that I should keep doing what I’m doing. You know, advising my friends. With one little tweak. They said I should listen more and say less.” She made a little face. “It was like they could see into my soul. And here I am blabbing on while you stare into space. Jason, I’m here. You can talk to me. If it helps, look at it as helping me in my listening journey.”
Although it was sweet of her to care, Holly was still a kid. How could she possibly understand what he was feeling? He didn’t really understand it himself.
“I want to rip his fucking face off and grind it under my boot.” Shocked at his vicious tone, he propelled himself off the stool and took a few steps away. “Sorry.”
Holly’s eyes were about as round as the hoop earrings she wore. “Jeezo. It sounds like you’re jealous.”
“Jealous? Of what? His thousand-dollar blazer? Million-dollar smile? Multi-million-dollar bank account?” He scrubbed his hand through his hair.
“Wait a minute. You probably have just as much money as he has.”
He’d finally told Holly his secret. She hadn’t even believed him until he showed her the account balance. God, he hated thinking about that money. The thought that it might make a difference to Kendra…no, he refused to think that.
“No, I don’t. I told you all that money is in a trust for you and Donna’s kids. And my kids, if I ever have any.”
“If you ever have any?” She spun a full circle on her stool. “That’s the first time I’ve ever heard you mention even the possibility of having kids.”
“People change,” he said tersely. “But it doesn’t matter now.”
“Why not? This is a major breakthrough for you. I thought you’d keep pretending that you wouldn’t be an amazing father for at least a decade more.”
Her therapy-speak, which he usually tolerated with good humor, grated on his nerves. “It’s not a breakthrough. It’s just a thought. And it’s over.” He turned his back on his sister and opened the fridge again. “Why don’t we have any beer?”
“Don’t look at me, I’m not even old enough to work at a counseling center.”
“I bet you could,” he said absently. “Front desk, answering the phone, whatever. You’d probably like that better than working at Alvin’s. Weren’t you thinking about going vegetarian?”
“Thinking about is not the same as actually doing. I love those Blue Balls burgers. And there you go, changing the subject again. But maybe you aren’t. Hang on, a stroke of brilliance is coming your way.”
He groaned out loud. “Holly, can you just give it a rest? You can’t fix my life. You can’t fix anyone’s life. Haven’t you learned that yet?”
She recoiled, making him realize that he’d snapped at her more sharply than he’d intended. Maybe more than he ever had before.
“Sorry,” he muttered.
“It’s okay. I guess you’re really hurting. Hurt people hurt people.”
He gritted his teeth to hold back the profanity that wanted to spurt out of him. The last thing he needed right now was some cliché, even if it was true.
Undaunted, Holly continued. “You’re telling me I shouldn’t give up. Well, you should take your own advice. Don’t give up on Kendra just because her ex came back. Fight for her. You’re better than him.”
But that was the thing. He wasn’t at all sure he was better than Dominic. “Have you seen him?”
“I don’t have to. Because I know you and there’s no way he’s better. I mean, he might be better for Kendra…”
He slammed the refrigerator door closed. “Is that supposed to make me feel better?”
