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"It's not a big deal, Mom. I'm fine," I tell her as I scoop up another spoonful of cereal and take a bite. "Besides, I'm pretty sure Kyle's using me the same way I'm using him."
My mother's hazel eyes, glinting gold and green from the morning light filtering in through the kitchen window, assess me shrewdly. "What does that mean?"
I shrug, take another bite of cereal. "He needs help moving his friend into an apartment. I'm literally trading labor for driving lessons."
Mom shakes her head slightly, as if she doesn't quite believe that's really all that's going on. "I made us hair appointments for Tuesday morning. I thought we could grab lunch after and then go Prom dress shopping."
"I'm not going to Prom," I inform her, a fresh wave of raw hurt splashing around in my chest.
"Why aren't you going to Prom?" Mom exhales heavily, taps her manicured nails on the oak-colored wood grain tabletop.
Lots of reasons. The main one? Matt asked someone else and I'm not really sure I want to torment myself all night watching him with Audra. I'm not going to tell her that, though. So, I settle with the easiest answer.
"No one asked me."
We both hear Kyle blaring his horn in the driveway, interrupting our conversation. I almost let out a sigh of relief.
"Gotta go," I tell Mom as I kiss her warm cheek and drop my bowl into the sink on the way out of the kitchen.
"Jenny, I—" but I don't hear what she says because I slam the front door shut behind me.
Kyle continues to blare his obnoxious horn as I walk down the concrete pathway towards him. I raise an eyebrow in his direction, suddenly decide I'm not in too much of a hurry to get to him. If he wants to be difficult, then I can be, too.
After a few minutes of tortuously, slow-paced walking, while taking in the early morning sights and sounds—the snow-capped peak in the distance, birds singing in the pine trees, the cold morning breeze rattling through the dead pine needles—my hand grips the handle of his car door. That's when I see a familiar yellow jeep driving up the street. What the hell? It's seven in the morning. Where has Matt been all night?
Oh.
I swallow hard when I remember who he was with. Where they were. What they were probably doing. A wave of nausea washes over me.
Matt's not that stupid...right? He wouldn't stay out all night with a girl, would he?
He's a teenage boy whose parents are almost as lax as mine. Who am I kidding?
Did he touch her? Touch her the way he touched me? Did he kiss her? Stare deep into her eyes and make her feel like she was the only other person in the universe?
The sharp pang in my chest reminds me I'm not supposed to care anymore. I'm not supposed to be thinking about Matt Thompson as anything other than my best friend. Person I play basketball with. Watch movies with. Not the person I'm in love with.
If only it were that easy.
He doesn't want you. He doesn't want you. He doesn't want you.
Yanking open Kyle's passenger door, I slide inside and slam the door shut behind me.
"Why are you always such an asshole?" I ask him as I grab the seatbelt and angrily click it in place.
"Did Jenny Kearns just say asshole?" He taunts me from the driver's seat. He rolls down the window and sticks his head outside. "Huh, that's weird."
"What's weird?" I snap as I close my eyes and pinch the bridge of my nose with my thumb and forefinger. Why did I agree to this again?
Driver's license, that's why.
"The sky isn't falling," he jokes as I hear him roll the window back up.
"Oh, just shut up. I'll have you know I use curse words every now and then." I roll my eyes and glance over at him. He's wearing the same sweatshirt from last night and a pair of skinny jeans. I hate that he looks so effortlessly good this early in the morning. Those stupid Thompson brothers and their stupid handsome genes. Dark, luscious hair. The same lively brown eyes with flecks of gold in them. Ugh, and their toned, tight bodies. Kyle is taller, lankier, but still muscular. And his skin is a few shades darker than Matt's, making him look tan all year long.
It just isn't fair. That out of all the places they could have ended up, they both ended up right next door to me. One my best friend and the guy I'm madly in love with. The other? An acquaintance hell-bent on annoying me whenever he can. But he was there for me when no one else was...or cared.
"Why the sour mood?" Kyle asks as he reverses out of the driveway. I slyly inhale his expensive cologne. Dangerous. Minty. Clean. The same smell from last night when he bought me a hot chocolate and sat quietly with me in the corner of the coffee shop. I let the silent tears fall until my puffy, red eyes seemed incapable of producing any more. Until my throat was raw and scratchy. Until there was just...nothing left.
