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He chews on the inside of his cheek, twists the fork between his fingers. "If I tell you, you can't tell anyone. Especially not Matt."
"I won't," I reassure him as I push my plate away, no longer hungry.
Kyle sets down the fork, crosses his arms over his chest. "Five years ago, my mom was defending this horrible guy for murdering his wife. He choked her to death. They were working late nights on the case, trying to pin it on the neighbor who had stopped by earlier in the day. The guy was on house arrest and my mom stayed with him in Denver to optimize her time and resources. She needed a file that she left in her home office. My dad and Matt had to leave really early the next morning for an away game, so I volunteered to bring it to her."
His face fills with so much anguish and pain and fury I can feel my heartbeat ringing in my ears.
"I banged on the front door for fifteen minutes before I opened it. I found them in his bedroom." His face pales and he grips the table with his hands, his knuckles turning white. "He was fucking her from behind, Jenny. I almost threw up all over that stupid, fucking file. My mom noticed me standing there first, but he wouldn't let her go until he finished."
His head falls into his hands, and I can see his shoulders slump with defeat and devastation and hurt. It's obvious he's never recovered from what he saw, what he witnessed.
I shove my chair back, stand up and hurry over to him. He lets me climb into his lap and hold him. "She told me she was in love with him and, as soon as he was vindicated, she was leaving my dad for him." I gently stroke the back of his neck, my heart aching for him. He looks like he's drowning, trying to breathe when it's impossible to.
"A few weeks later, he was found guilty. Sentenced to life. My mom was devastated. But she came home, put on this big show. Pretended she was still madly in love with my dad. She found out she was pregnant a little after that." I feel his body tense beneath me. "She made me drive her to get rid of it." I can feel his chest heaving and his breath quickening against my body. "I was only 16. I had no fucking clue what she was doing, what I was taking her to do. She was getting rid of the evidence so my dad wouldn't leave her. Then, she made me promise never to tell anyone or it would ruin our family. I was so young. Too young to hide all of that for her. And it's just...it's been eating me alive for years."
A few tears spill down my face.
Kyle's thumb finds my cheek, he wipes the tears from my face. "Don't cry, baby."
I bury my face into his shoulder, hot tears falling faster as I wrap my arms around his neck. I had no idea, no idea, he had been through all of that. Had kept his mother's dark secrets. No wonder he hated coming home. But he still came home, anyway. Never missed a birthday brunch or holiday or school break or vacation.
"I wish I had known," I hold back a sob. "I was so mean to you."
"Fighting with you was always a good distraction." His fingers find my hair and he twirls a blond strand, smiles sadly. "You made it...bearable."
"Your dad never found out?" I ask.
His eyes dart to mine, shining with guilt and betrayal and unease. "I never told him. I probably should have. Probably still should."
My fingers find his cheek. "Thank you for trusting me with this." I kiss his lips slowly, softly, tenderly. An unspoken promise that I'll keep his secret.
His mother's secrets.
He reaches across the table, grabs my plate. "We only have a few more hours left together. I don't want my mom to ruin it."
"If you want, I can check in on her. Make sure she's alright," I offer as I pick up my fork and slice through the soft pancake.
Kyle nods his head absentmindedly. "If you want to. I have Matt keeping an eye out."
We eat breakfast in silence after that, one of Kyle's arms snugly wrapped around my waist as I sit on his lap, breathing in the same air.
After we clean up, we end up back in bed. White sheets wrapped around us, our legs twined together and our mouths, arms, crushing into one another as we hold onto each other.
I don't want to leave him. I don't want to leave his bed. I want to stay here with him, let the world pass by while we stay locked in his bedroom, just like this. Forever.
His fingers find a strand of blond hair and he slips it behind my ear. "You're so beautiful."
My cheeks heat from the intensity of his gaze, the certainty in his voice. I touch my lips to his, revel in the warmth and safety of being in his arms.
"I love you," I whisper in his ear as I climb on top of him.
We get lost in each other one last time before I grab my things, walk down the concrete steps to Danny's truck. Kyle's hand never leaves mine as a heavy sadness lingers over both of us.
"Two weeks," he reminds me. "I'll see you in two weeks for vacation."
"It's too long," I whine as I slip my arms around his neck, inhale his scent one last time.
Kyle pulls me flush against him. "I love you, baby." He presses his forehead against mine. "Drive careful."
